Build a Taco Bell Order and We'll Guess When You First Got Laid

By: Ian Fortey
Estimated Completion Time
4 min
Build a Taco Bell Order and We'll Guess When You First Got Laid
Image: martinedoucet/E+/Getty Images

About This Quiz

You know, if you really stop to think about it, ordering food is quite an intimate experience.  You're giving into an appetite, a craving that you just can't resist.  It plagues your thoughts, sitting at the back of your mind demanding to be acknowledged.  It wants you to give over, even if you know it's maybe bad for you.  It's your mind and body betraying you to some baser hunger.  And you give in so very often.

If ordering a meal can be so closely compared to other desires we have, then maybe it's not crazy to suggest that we could use your Taco Bell order to learn more about you. Maybe if you go over the details of your opinions on crunchy taco shells and spicy Fire sauce, it will paint a picture of just how you react to those desires you have.  Maybe we'll gain a clear and concise understanding of your motivations and hunger. Maybe we can even use that to figure out when you lost your virginity.

It may sound far-fetched, but remember, all we're talking about is desire and how you respond to it.  Take the quiz and tell us what you like and don't like.  We'll crunch the numbers like a tortilla shell and tell you exactly when you first got laid.

Some like their Taco Bell hot. Really hot. What's the spicy menu item for you?
Spicy Tostada
Spicy Chalupa
Anything with Fire Sauce
Fiery Doritos Locos Taco

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When you need to cool it way, way down, you can reach for a Taco Bell Freeze. What flavor will get the job done?
Skittles Freeze
Airheads White Mystery Freeze
Mountain Dew Spiked Lemonade Freeze
Mountain Dew Baja Blast Freeze

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Everyone loves those witty little sauce packets, they're conversation starters. Which sauce do you crave most?
Mild
Hot
Fire
Verde

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Suppose you and a friend have an early morning together and need to grab breakfast. What breakfast item sounds best?
Breakfast Soft Tacos
Grilled Breakfast Burrito
Breakfast Crunchwrap
Grande Scrambler

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Everyone knows it's fun to share nachos with someone else. What dip are you having?
Nacho Cheese
Salsa
Guacamole
Pico de Gallo

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Did you know that about 35% of all the meat eaten in the world is chicken? That's a lot of chicken! Which chicken item would you devour?
Chicken Soft Taco
Naked Chicken Chalupa
Shredded Chicken Burrito
Chicken Quesadilla

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Taco Bell doesn't go all crazy with their desserts, but they have offered a few sugary delights. What would you want to try most?
Kit Kat Quesadilla
Caramel Apple Empanada
Cinnabon Delights
Cinnamon Twists

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Some might say that a party isn't a party without Taco Bell. What Party Pack is the best for your shindig?
Rolled Chicken Tacos Party Pack
Taco 12 Pack
Variety Taco 12 Pack
Supreme Variety Pack

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All those tortillas are going to make you thirsty. What beverage will rehydrate you?
Mountain Dew
Pepsi
Pink Lemonade
Iced Coffee

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Veggies keep everything lively. What veggie is going in your taco no matter what?
Lettuce
Tomato
Onion
Guacamole

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For all the veggie options Taco Bell has, they're still missing a few things. What vegetable would you add if you could?
Corn
Peppers
Avocado
Sweet Potato

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There's a whole bunch of extras you can add to a taco if you want. Which sounds best to you?
Red Strips
Fritos
Jalapenos
Seasoned Rice

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You can add spice with sauce packets, but there are more flavorful sauces to add, too. Which sauce will pep up your order?
Sour Cream
Nacho Cheese
Avocado Ranch Dressing
Red Sauce

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Maybe you're a beef fan and need the perfect steak item for lunch. What steak is going to be best?
Steak Soft Taco
XXL Grilled Steak Stuft Burrito
A.M. Steak Crunchwrap
Steak Burrito Supreme

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What Taco Bell menu items are you going to stay as far away from as humanly possible?
Naked Egg Taco
Naked Chicken Chips
Sausage Flatbread Quesadilla
Naked Chicken Chalupa

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What kind of cheese should be on every single taco ever?
Grated Cheddar
Nacho Cheese
Lava Sauce
Three-Cheese Blend

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Are you in the market for beans? Taco Bell will bean you right up. Pick your beany best.
Bean Burrito
Pintos N Cheese
Black Bean Burrito
Black Beans and Rice

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You know what's pretty filling? Rice! Which one of these rice-infused dishes is calling your name?
A Side of Rice
Cheesy Bean and Rice Burrito
Black Beans and Rice
7-Layer Burrito

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Taco Bell had to prove its beef was really beef once, and it is. But it also has additives. Which one sounds least appealing?
Torula yeast
Maltodextrin
Sodium phosphates
Trehalose

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What is the single greatest item on the whole Taco Bell menu?
Crunchwrap Supreme
Soft Tacos
Mexican Pizza
Crunchy Tacos

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Is it quesadilla time? It is! What kind of quesadilla is the most delicious?
Cheese quesadilla
Kit Kat Quesadilla
Steak Quesadilla
Chicken Quesadilla

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You could bury yourself in cheese with the right Taco Bell order. What cheesy item is the best of them all?
Cheesy Roll Up
Cheese Quesadilla
Cheesy Gordita Crunch
Cheesy Bean and Rice Burrito

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When Taco Bell meets junk food, magic happens. What Taco Bell + junk food pairing was the most memorable?
Nacho Cheese Doritos Locos Taco
Kit Kat Quesadilla
Cheetos Burrito
Beefy Fritos Burrito

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You can get a pretty good meal at Taco Bell as a vegetarian. What meatless option is best?
Cheesy Roll Up
Bean Burrito
7-Layer Burrito
Power Menu Bowl

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You need to wrap your taco up in something. What's your go-to choice?
Soft tortilla
Doritos Taco Shell
Gordita
Crunchy tortilla

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Some of Taco Bell's past experiments have been kind of awful. Which one sounds the worst?
Naked Egg Taco
Seafood Salad
Blackjack Taco
Firecracker Burrito with Pop Rocks

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Fusion cuisine is always popular. If you were going to eat a soft taco alongside some other fast food, what would it be?
McDonald's Fries
KFC Chicken
Whopper
Big Mac

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Most Taco Bells don't have fries on the menu, but there are still plenty of potato options. What sounds best?
Hash browns
Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes
Cheesy Potato Burrito
Breakfast Grilled Burrito Fiesta Potato

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Taco Bell tosses some weird items at you now and then. What non-traditional option is the best of the bunch?
Kit Kat Quesadilla
Fiesta Taco Salad
Crunchwrap Supreme
Mexican Pizza

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When you're ordering from Taco Bell, what's your main motivation?
Cheap price
It's fast.
Lots of options
Pretty tasty

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You Got: