Can We Guess If You Own a Truck?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
4 min
How did you get into your line of work?
My family.
My friend's dad.
It was advertised in the paper.
I started with a college internship.

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How much of your work is in your office?
Almost none of it.
A bit of it.
Most of it.
All of it.

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How often do you wear a tie?
Almost never.
On some rare occasions.
Most of the time.
You can't be seen wearing a tie when you work in social media!

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What kind of jacket do you wear to work?
Denim.
Leather.
Synthetic.
Tweed.

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What kind of trousers do you wear to work?
Wranglers
Levis
Dockers
Gaberdines

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What footwear do you wear to work?
Steel toe Timberland boots.
Combat boots.
New Balance M990s.
Loafers.

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How calloused are your hands?
Not too bad. I wear gloves.
Pretty calloused.
Not very calloused.
Not calloused at all.

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What tool could you not do without at work?
My tape measure.
My hammer drill.
My smart phone.
My Echo.

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How do you find most of your professional clients?
Trade shows.
The paper.
LinkedIn.
Facebook.

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How tanned are you?
Like a catcher's mitt.
Like a body builder.
Only a little.
I'm as tan as milk.

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Where do you have tan lines?
My shoulders.
My waist.
My thighs.
I have no tan lines.

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Do you sail at all?
A little.
Once a year.
Yes, a lot.
Not at all.

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Do you like to fish?
I love to fish!
I try to fish at least a couple times a month.
I'll fish, on vacation.
I'm a vegan.

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How do you hunt?
I love to hunt! I've got a bow, a rifle, and a shotgun!
I've got a few heads mounted on my wall.
I've never tried it, but I'd like to.
I'm a member of PETA.

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What pets do you own?
I've got a couple dogs.
I'd like a dog, but I don't have one.
I own a cat.
I used to have some fish.

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How many kids do you have?
Three. Love 'em.
I've got one on the way.
Two, both out of the house.
No, none.

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Have you ever ridden a snowmobile?
Plenty of times!
A few times. It's fun.
I've never done it, but I'd like to!
No, my hands get cold too quickly.

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Have you ever been to a wine tasting?
What? No.
What's the point of that?
Yes, at a party for a friend.
Many times! I had an exquisite pino noir!

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What's the first thing you do when you board a train?
I don't know. I don't take the train enough to know.
Uh... find my seat?
Move to the middle of the car.
Take off my backpack! What do I look like, a barbarian?

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What knot do you use to tie your tie?
I don't.
A granny knot.
There's more than one?
A double Windsor.

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What is the key to correctly wearing a waistcoat?
Putting it on?
Tying the sleeves around your waist?
Leave the bottom button unbuttoned.
Keep it clean.

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Functionally speaking, what makes torque different from horsepower?
Torque determines how much you can tow.
Torque means how fast you can accelerate.
Torque is what you get from diesel or electric motors.
Torque is... a Martin Henderson movie?

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How many M80s do you need to blow up a tree stump?
Just one. Gotta get it in the right spot is all.
Two, just to make sure.
I dunno. Eight?
Ha! Trick question! It's eighty!

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What brand of pocket knife do you own?
Benchmade.
Zero Tolerance.
SOG
Victorinox.

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What is a duvet?
Is it some new kind of torx screw?
Is it an auto-hammer?
It's like, a blanket right?
It's the base blanket you slip into a cover before laying on a bed.

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What is a tapcon?
A screw designed to go into concrete.
A screw you'd better drive with a hammer drill.
Is it a lie that involves tapping?
Is it a video game company?

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What is the key to making an excellent crème brûlée?
Measure twice, cut once.
Always make sure your thumb is out of the way.
Use really good crème?
Keep the custard really cold until the moment you use the blowtorch.

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What time does your train come in the morning?
I drive straight to the work site.
My buddy drives me to work.
I carpool.
7:30 am, which is a shame since my local cafe doesn't open until 7:45 am.

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What bothers you the most about other drivers?
No lane discipline.
No one signals.
People are too slow!
They are polluting Earth with their carbon emissions.

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What brand of truck do you like best?
Ford.
Dodge.
Chevy.
Tesla?

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