Can We Guess Which NFL Team You Root For?

By: Steven Miller

Can We Guess Which NFL Team You Root For?
Image: Keith Allison

About This Quiz

Each NFL team's fans have their own unique qualities and idiosyncrasies. Between these characteristics and the traditions involved with your franchise, we figure we've got a good shot at guessing the colors you wear on Sundays in the fall. Your team's performance in recent years should seal the deal.

If you've grown so accustomed to winning that it's almost becoming boring and you believe that "Deflategate" is a fabrication to try and bring down a franchise that can't be beaten any other way, it seems clear that you are a Patriots fan. Your reaction to the day that Brady and Belichick retire will also be a clear sign that you wear the red, white and blue.

Perhaps you're on the other end of that spectrum. If you've celebrated a winless season with a parade, and you've stated, "There's always next year," during the first game of the season, we're going to guess that you're probably a Browns fan. If you're taking solace in your basketball team, then we're even more sure of our prediction.

If your fellow fans have thrown snowballs at Santa Claus in the past and you're still riding high from your first ever Super Bowl victory, then it's obvious that you're an Eagles fan. Resist the urge to boo during the quiz if you can.

Let the tailgating begin. The food you eat is sure to tell us a lot too.

How long has it been since your team won the Super Bowl?
We've never won a Super Bowl.
We just won!
We won very recently.
It's been a while.

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What do you think the chances are that your team will have a winning season this year?
It would be a huge disappointment if we didn't have a winning season. We've gotten used to it.
The chances are very good that we'll do well next year.
It's hard to say at this point. It's probably 50/50.
That would take more than a minor miracle.

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Of the following, which team is your biggest rival?
Washington Redskins.
New York Giants.
Dallas Cowboys.
Cincinnati Bengals.

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Do you watch more high school, college or pro football?
I focus on high school football.
I'm more of a college football fan.
I love all football. I'll watch it in any form.
I'm all about the pros.

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Which food item are you most likely to order at the game?
Beer, lots of beer.
A cheesesteak sandwich.
A bratwurst.
Nachos.

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How long are you tailgating before the game?
I'm getting there first thing in the morning.
I'm camping there overnight.
I'll likely arrive about three or four hours before kick-off.
I might get there an hour or two before the game.

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Which color scheme is most appealing to you?
Navy blue, silver and white.
Green, silver and white.
Brown, orange and white.
Red, white and blue.

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Which jersey number are you most likely to wear?
29.
12.
21.
4.

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Do you have any weird rituals that you engage in before the game?
No. If anything, I try to do the opposite of what I've been doing.
I have a couple small rituals, but I'm not crazy about them.
I started with some game day rituals in the past year.
I have a whole list of things I do before, during and after every game.

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How likely are you to boo your own team if they're playing poorly?
It takes a lot for me to start booing, but it's still very possible.
It's almost unheard of for me to boo my team.
Yeah, I'll definitely start booing at some point.
After all these years, I just kind of expect them to play poorly.

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How emotionally tied are you to the result of the game?
I barely let myself care anymore.
I'm so tied to the result that it will have a major impact on my life.
I am emotionally tied to the result, but that has led to a lot of positive emotions in recent years.
I've learned to have some emotional detachment from the results.

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How much sports radio do you listen to?
I definitely have my favorite shows that I check out pretty regularly.
That's pretty much all I listen to during the season.
I'll tune in once in a while.
I can't stand sports talk radio.

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What are your thoughts on "Deflategate"?
I always knew those guys had to be bending the rules.
Cheaters!
It was probably blown out of proportion.
They'll do anything to try to bring down a dynasty.

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Of the following, which quarterback causes you the most discomfort?
Dak Prescott.
Aaron Rogers.
Tom Brady.
Drew Brees.

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Of the following, who is the best quarterback to ever play in the NFL?
Peyton Manning.
Tom Brady.
Joe Montana.
Roger Staubach.

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Of the following, who is the greatest coach in NFL history?
Paul Brown.
Tom Landry.
Vince Lombardi.
Bill Belichick.

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How will you react when Tom Brady and Bill Belichick retire?
I'll say, "Good riddance".
I will be very sad.
I'm throwing a party.
I couldn't care any less.

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Which iconic fan cheering section do you enjoy the most?
The Dawg Pound.
The Black Hole.
The 12th Man.
The Hogettes.

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Have you ever said something like, "There's always next year", during the first game of the season?
Why would I ever say that?
I used to say things like that, but not anymore.
I'm starting to think that way.
Oh yeah, I pretty much say that every year.

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Do you expect to win?
I used to expect to win, but I'm not so sure anymore.
I used to expect to lose, but that's changing dramatically.
No, I expect to lose.
Yes, I definitely always expect my team to win.

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How into fantasy football are you?
I have a bunch of fantasy teams.
I don't play fantasy football.
I have a team. It's really the only thing that makes football season bearable.
I played in the past, but not anymore.

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Which running back would you say is the best of all time?
Emmitt Smith.
Walter Payton.
Barry Sanders.
Jim Brown.

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Which wide receiver is the GOAT?
Jerry Rice.
Calvin Johnson.
Randy Moss.
Michael Irvin.

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How likely are you to wear face paint to a game?
That's not my style at all.
I always wear face paint to the game
I've worn it before, but I think those days are behind me.
I might, but just to disguise myself. Being a fan of my team is embarrassing.

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When you tell someone from outside your area which team is your favorite, how do they usually react?
They used to hate us a lot more than they do now.
That's hard to say. It varies all over the spectrum.
They feel sorry for me.
They don't hide their disgust for my team.

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Have you ever attended a parade for a zero-win season?
No, that sounds sad. I'm not in Cleveland or Detroit.
No, but I have for a perfect regular season.
Yeah, it was so pathetic.
Aw, isn't that cute?

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Besides football, which other sport do you enjoy watching the most?
Basketball.
Golf.
Baseball.
Hockey.

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Does the number 214 mean anything to you?
That's a good record for the season for my team.
Those are the numbers of our two best players.
Yeah, and it irritates me.
Nope, I have no idea what you're talking about.

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Do you own a fedora?
I rarely wear it, but I do own one.
I have a buddy who has one and we make fun of him all the time.
Honestly, I wish I could pull that look off.
I would never wear a fedora.

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How do you feel about Jerry Jones?
I love Jerry Jones.
I respect him, but he's not my cup of tea.
He's the worst.
I don't give a second of thought to Jerry Jones.

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