Quiz: Can you match the quote to the Gilmore Girls character who said it?
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Can you match the quote to the Gilmore Girls character who said it?
By: Maria Trimarchi
Image: The WB (2000–06) The CW (2006–07)

About This Quiz

Where you lead, I will follow ... anywhere that you tell me to. True "Gilmore Girls" fans know it by heart -- and that Carole King had a part on the show. How many quotes can you match to the Gilmores and everyone else in Stars Hollow?

1.0 of 35
"How am I supposed to get into Harvard if I have no wilderness skills?"

"Maybe you'll have to give up your dream of majoring in logging," replies Lorelai when Rory anxiously asks, "How am I supposed to get into Harvard if I have no wilderness skills?"

2.0 of 35
"Oy, with the poodles already."

During one Friday night during Season 2, Lorelai realizes "oy is the funniest word in the entire world." Pairing it with "poodles," she suggests a new catchphrase, "like, oy with the poodles already," much to Emily's chagrin.

Hurry up! On the day Rory packs and moves to college, she yells to Lorelai, "When did I become one of those girls with dozens of beauty products, none of which are expendable? It used to be a touch of mascara, dab of Coppertone, zip, bam, boom, out the door." But Lorelai hears "copper" and "boom," and later uses it as a phrase meaning hurry up.

4.0 of 35
"By the way, I think you might be the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen, outside of a really filthy magazine."

This sweet-yet-creepy complement is Kirk's way of asking Lorelai out on a date, after Luke encourages him to do so.

5.0 of 35
"I am not going to Harvard. I had sex, but I’m not going to Harvard."

When high-strung Paris Geller doesn't get into Harvard, her No. 1 school choice (and she's legacy, you know), she melts down during her speech on C-SPAN, saying, "Can anyone here believe that I’m not going to Harvard? I can’t. I’m not going to Harvard. I am not going to Harvard. I had sex, but I’m not going to Harvard."

6.0 of 35
"Who wants to hear about the time I danced in a cage for Tito Puente?"

In Season 1 we see Miss Patty telling the story of Stars Hollow to a group of kids. After which she asks, "Now, we still have a little time left in our story hour. Who wants to hear about the time I danced in a cage for Tito Puente?" ("It was the summer of '66 ...)

7.0 of 35
What does Lorelai call this new game, made from "Uno and Checkers, and Battleship and most of the pieces of Candyland. Which I figure, we can mix together to create a fabulous new game, ____."

"War never tasted so good!" says Lorelai, when she finds Uno, Checkers, Battleship and most of the pieces of Candyland. Which, she figures, "we can mix together to create a fabulous new game, Candyship Battleland."

8.0 of 35
When Rory suggests Lorelai "should walk down the aisle to Frank Sinatra, with a huge bouquet of something that smells really good," how does Lorelai respond?

What comes to mind first for Lorelai Gilmore when asked for something that smells really good? "Pot roast!"

9.0 of 35
Who is Emily Gilmore talking about when she says, "You’re idiots, the both of you"?

Outside of Richard's hospital room, Emily asks Luke "what exactly is going on between the two." After Luke replies that they're "friends, that's it," Emily calls them idiots, the both of them

10.0 of 35
Luke has "no patience for ____ hands."

Luke, freaking out over the arrival of his 17-year-old nephew, Jess, tell Lorelai, "I don't even like kids. They're always sticky like they've got jam on their hands. Even if there's no jam in the house, somehow, they've always got jam on their hands! I'm not the right guy to deal with that. I have no patience for jam hands!" Luckily, Lorelai reminds him that Jess has probably grown out of "jam hands."

11.0 of 35
What kind of smoothie is Lorelai talking about when she says, "I would like a cheeseburger, with a side of cheeseburger, and see if they can make me a ____ smoothie"?

Christopher and Lorelai accidentally nap for several hours when they arrive in Paris. And when they wake at 4 a.m., Lorelai is in the mood for "a cheeseburger, with a side of cheeseburger, and see if they can make me a ____ smoothie."

12.0 of 35
Who is Lorelai describing when she says, "Smell that? The room smells like guilt and Chanel No. 5."

It's Emily that Lorelai is talking about when she says, "My mother — she was here. I can feel it. Smell that? The room smells like guilt and Chanel No. 5."

13.0 of 35
What new word does Sookie make up when she says, "Oh, that makes me so mad. And so sad. I'm ____."?

Sookies's so mad and so sad that she's "smad" when Lorelai tells her The Bracebridge Group is stuck in Chicago, snowed in and the dinner's off. "I've got thirty pounds of aged beef, trays and trays of trout, mountains of pruned tarts. I diced pumpkins until my hands turned orange," laments Sookie. "I've got pumpkin hands."

14.0 of 35
When Lorelai says, "But then I asked myself, "W.W.T.B.F.C.D.??" what does W.W.T.B.F.C.D. stand for?

When she asks herself, "W.W.T.B.F.C.D.??", Lorelai is talking about the Barefoot Contessa -- What Would the Barefoot Contessa Do? "And it came to me in a flash. 'I'm gonna make waffles.'"

15.0 of 35
What food does Lorelai compare marzipan to when Emily gifts it to her? "Marzipan’s not candy! It’s a unique substance unto itself, like ____ or plutonium."

Marzipan is an almond paste which is made of finely ground almonds, sugar, water and sometimes egg. It can be eaten as candy, but it's often used as fondant. But to Lorelai, who doesn't care for it, it probably shouldn't be eaten at all: "Marzipan’s not candy! It’s a unique substance unto itself, like Velveeta or plutonium."

16.0 of 35

After Sherry Tinsdale sends Lorelai and Rory home with the leftover deviled eggs ("Take the deviled eggs!") from her baby shower, Rory decides the best catharsis from the shower experience would be to devil-egg Jess' car. " I don’t think there’s been a better use of deviled eggs in culinary history," says Lorelai.

Just how soon is soon? "When the big hand hits the 'S' and the little hand hits the 'OON'," according to Lorelai.

18.0 of 35
"And it's so hard to believe that at exactly this time many moons ago, I was lying in exactly the same position ..."

Every year at 4:03 a.m. on October 8, Lorelai wakes her daughter to tell her the story of her birth. It begins, "And it's so hard to believe that at exactly this time many moons ago, I was lying in exactly the same position ..."

19.0 of 35
How does Emily describe young Lorelai to Rory? "As a child, your mother had an unusually large ____."

When Emily refers to Lorelai's "unusually large head," in her childhood, Lorelai responds, "The best thing about it was that she would tell me — constantly. My first complete sentence was, 'Big Head want dolly.'"

20.0 of 35
During a town meeting to discuss Luke's nephew Jess, Lorelai jumps in with, "I hear he controls ____, and wrote the screenplay to 'Glitter!'"

As the town discusses what to do about Luke's nephew, Jess, Lorelai contributes the line, "I hear he controls the weather and wrote the screenplay to 'Glitter!'"

21.0 of 35
Who is Lorelai speaking to when she says, "I think I have unconsciously sabotaged every decent relationship I’ve had, including the one with Max, because I was waiting for you, and I shouldn’t have been."

In Season 2, Lorelai goes so far as to tell Christopher that she's always held him as a "what if," until now, when he's having a baby with Sherry. Her full quote is, "But you and I have been so linked in my mind that I think I have unconsciously sabotaged every decent relationship I’ve had, including the one with Max, because I was waiting for you, and I shouldn’t have been. And now that I see that, and I see you settling down with Sherry, I think I can move beyond it."

22.0 of 35

Never tell Lorelai there is "no such thing" as a stupid question. Luke did, and she followed up with, "How does ink come out of pens?" Forcing Luke to concede, "there is such a thing" as a stupid question.

23.0 of 35

In an episode called "A House is Not a Home," -- the same episode where Rory and Logan steal a yacht and get arrested -- Lorelai proposes to Luke at his diner. (And he says yes.)

24.0 of 35
Who says this to Rory, "I have to tell you, you don’t got it. Now, guts can be wrong. Mine’s been wrong before. But not often …"?

When he offered her the internship, Mitchum Huntzberger told Rory, "Say the only reason I offered this to you is because my family behaved badly and I wanted to make up for it. Say I have no interest in furthering your career. This is still an opportunity. Who cares why you got the opportunity? It’s here, and life is about making the most of everything you’re handed. Well, this is being handed to you. Now, what are you going to do about it?" After she takes it and works at it, he tells her he's worked with a lot of interns and new hires over the years, and she, Rory, "don't got it."

25.0 of 35
"We can form an all-girl band with Lane, you know, like Bananarama. We could call it Tangerinarama or Banana-fana-fo-fana-rama … or something."

Rory and Paris are stressed about getting into Harvard, and Lane is stressed about the right people for the band. Lorelai suggests to Rory that "maybe instead of going to college, you should drop out and I could quit my job and we can form an all-girl band with Lane, you know, like Bananarama. We could call it Tangerinarama or Banana-fana-fo-fana-rama … or something."

26.0 of 35

Thanksgiving at Sookie and Jackson's takes an interesting turn when the group deep fries the turkey. Sookie, bewildered by all the deep frying, asks Lorelai and Rory, "Am I crying or laughing?"

27.0 of 35
Who is Lane talking about during her drunken phone call to her mother, when she says: I'm in love with ____. He's my guy, not Young Chui.

Lane, drunk at a gig, drunk-dials her mother and tells her she's "in love with Dave Rygalski. He’s my guy, not Young Chui. Young Chui’s a ship in the night, Mama. Not even a ship, he’s a little tugboat tooting along and I’m not gonna go to the prom with him, uh uh. I’m going with Dave because we rock together, Mama. The charade is over." Oh, Lane.

28.0 of 35
"You look like little birds help you get dressed in the morning."

Paris, trying to convince Rory to run for vice president of their class, lists the following reasons, "Because people like you. You're quiet. You say 'excuse me'. You look like little birds help you get dressed in the morning." Rory's first reply? "Hey, I haven't been dressed by a bird since I was 2."

29.0 of 35
"Now, did anyone ever tell you to picture the audience in their underwear? Well, don't do it. I did it once and I had nightmares for a week. Bulgarians in Speedos."

Richard Gilmore gives this advice to Rory before she has to do public speaking. Good advice for all of us, Richard. Thank you.

30.0 of 35
"I mean, we’re not good friends but we’re friends. We’re friendly... Friendish might be a better term."

Rory describes her relationship with Jess as "friendish" to Lorelai.

31.0 of 35
What drink does Lorelai describe as "a fair-weather friend who seems benign, but packs a wallop like a donkey kick, and that is the ____."

Lorelai's full quote about the Long Island iced tea, to Rory, is, "Honey, someday when you're a little older you will be introduced to something that is extremely seductive but fickle. A fair-weather friend who seems benign but packs a wallop like a donkey kick, and that is the Long Island iced tea. The Long Island iced tea makes you do things that you normally wouldn't do, like lifting your skirt in public or calling someone you normally wouldn't call at really weird times." And Rory's reply? "I'm not looking forward to meeting the Long Island iced tea." Walk away, Rory, just walk away.

32.0 of 35
"Do not eat chips out of a communal bowl. You might as well stick your hand in a toilet."

Hep Alien's playing a gig, and Rory and Jess are going to the party. Before she goes, Lorelai dispenses this solid advice about party foods, "Do not eat chips out of a communal bowl. You might as well stick your hand in a toilet. If you're desperate, offer to be the person who replenishes them with new bags and grab a handful out of the new bag and dump the rest in the communal bowl."

33.0 of 35
"I'm attracted to pie. It doesn't mean I feel the need to date pie."

This is Lorelai's response to Max Medina, who is trying to convince her to date him. "Because clearly we're attacted to each other."

34.0 of 35
Who gives the advice, "I'm afraid once your heart is involved, it all comes out in moron?"

You remember how it feels to like someone in high school? Rory is freaking out, and is afraid she'll "do or say anything else that’s gonna be remotely moronic." Lorelai, knowingly, advises her, "I'm afraid once your heart is involved, it all comes out in moron."

35.0 of 35
"I live in two worlds. One is a world of books."

This quote is from the graduation speech Rory delivers at Chilton. She continues, "I've been a resident of Faulkner's Yoknapatawpha County, hunted the white whale aboard the Pequod, fought alongside Napoleon, sailed a raft with Huck and Jim, committed absurdities with Ignatius J. Reilly, rode a sad train with Anna Karenina and strolled down Swann's Way. It's a rewarding world, but my second one is by far superior. My second one is populated with characters slightly less eccentric, but supremely real, made of flesh and bone, full of love, who are my ultimate inspiration for everything. Richard and Emily Gilmore are kind, decent, unfailingly generous people. They are my twin pillars, without whom I could not stand. I am proud to be their grandchild. But my ultimate inspiration comes from my best friend, the dazzling woman from whom I received my name and my life's blood, Lorelai Gilmore." As it continues about her love for her mother, Luke, Lorelai, Sookie and Jackson can't not cry.

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