Defensive Much?! How Do You Handle Criticism?

By: Brian Whitney

Image: Shutterstock

About This Quiz

Getting criticism from our partners, bosses, and family is a part of life, but all of us handle it differently. How defensive are you really? Let's find out!

Your partner asked you to help clean a little more around the house, what do you think?

Nothing, I just help clean a bit.

I get a little uptight, but I ignore it and help clean.
I wonder why they are always giving me such a hard time?

I get mad, I clean way more than my partner.

What do you think when you get negative feedback?

That it is an opportunity to improve myself.

That it is part of life.
That the person giving it to me has an agenda.

That the person giving it to me is wrong.

What do you think if your partner doesn't want to go to the same movie as you?

Nothing much, I don't care.

That they have different tastes.
That they would rather be doing something else.

That they think I am dumb.

You just submitted an idea to your boss, and they said it was boring, how do you feel?

I am glad they can be honest with me.

I am fine, but I wish they chose a different word that wasn't offensive.
I am a little upset.

I am enraged.

Someone in your art class just told you that they liked something you painted, but that you could improve your technique, what do you think?

That they are right.

That they might be right, but they didn't need to say that.
That they are wrong.

That they are a total jerk.

Your partner just said you were cute, how does that make you feel?

Awesome!

Pretty good.
Well, I would have preferred beautiful.

Cute? What am I, a dog?

How often are you really to blame for your failures?

I don't look at things as failures.

Not often.
Usually.

This question makes me angry.

If you wind up being defensive on this quiz, what will you think?

I will think it is funny.

I will think it is interesting.
I will think it is wrong.

I will think the person that wrote it is an idiot.

You scored 30 points but your team lost, what do you tell the reporters afterward?

That we lost as a team.

That we all did out best.
That there was nothing else you could do.

That I need better teammates.

Your doctor just said you needed to lose a little weight, how do you feel?

Happy that they told me

Fine, no one likes to hear that really though.
I think they are wrong, I look fine.

I think they are an idiot.

You just got cut from the team, why?

I wasn't quite good enough.

I didn't practice enough.
I didn't kiss up to the coach.

The coach is clueless.

You just got a 95 on your English paper, but your friend got a 97. How come?

He did a better job than I did.

He worked harder than me.
The teacher likes him better.

He cheated.

If someone messes with you, do you go right back at them?

No, it isn't worth it.

It depends on the situation.
Not always, but I will get them back somehow.

Oh yeah, I live for that stuff.

Do you ever lose an argument?

Sure I do.

Sometimes.
Not usually.

Never.

Do people ever call you a hypocrite?

Not ever.

Hardly ever.
Sometimes.

All the time.

How easy is it for you to admit you are wrong?

Very easy.

Sort of easy.
Not very easy.

Really hard.

When do you say you are sorry?

When I have done something wrong.

When I feel like someone thinks I did something wrong.
When I want to move on and stop talking about something.

When I know saying it will get me what I want.

Do you feel that if you don't defend yourself, you will get taken advantage of?

No, that is a silly way to think.

Not usually.
Usually.

Yes, you can't let someone take advantage of you.

The light just turned green and someone behind you honked at you to go, how do you react?

I just wave and start driving.

I just go, but I am irritated.
I peel out really fast.

I turn around, stare at them and flip them off.

If people accuse you of being defensive, do you sometimes then accuse them of being defensive?

No, that seems kind of silly.

I have to admit I have done it before.
I do that a lot.

Well, yeah. Only because it is true.

Do people say you are a black and white thinker?

No, I have never been told that.

No, but sometimes I wonder if I am.
Yeah, I get that sometimes.

Yes, I get that a lot.

Your partner stayed out late and when they came home you yelled at them. How come?

Because I felt insecure.

Because I felt tired of being put in this position.
Because they drink way too much.

Because they made me angry.

Are other people responsible for how you feel?

No. Only I control that.

No, but it is hard not to feel that way.
I would say so, yes.

Of course they are.

You and your friend disagree on who would make the best president and had a discussion about it, how did it make you feel?

Good that we trust each other enough to disagree.

It was awkward but fine.
That they think I am an idiot.

That they are an idiot.

You and your team just messed up an assignment at work, how come?

I am not sure, but we can pull it together and get it right.

People, myself included, didn't take it seriously enough.
Other people were slacking and I got frustrated.

The instructions to the assignment were bad.

Your partner just sat you down and said your bad moods have been hard to deal with lately. How does that make you feel?

You appreciate that they trust you enough to tell you.

Uncomfortable.
It makes me think they want to break up.

It makes me angry; they are the one with the bad moods.

Your boss just asked you to do something at work differently, even though the way you have been doing is working fine. How do you react?

I am cool with it. They are the boss after all.

It bugs me, but I fake it.
I don't say anything, but inside I am pretty angry.

I tell them that their way is totally wrong.

Someone stole something at work but no one knows who; how does that make you feel?

I don't care all that much, it doesn't have anything to do with me.

It makes me mad that someone would steal.
I am upset because now everyone is a suspect.

I am upset because I am a suspect.

Your partner was gone for the day and just asked you what you did, how do you respond?

I fill them in on my day.

I tell them some things, but I leave some things out.
I get a little mad because they are so nosy.

I get really mad because they think I am cheating.

You are walking your dog down the street and see some dog poop on your neighbors lawn, how do you react?

I don't think anything of it.

I hope no one thinks my dog did it.
I pick it up, otherwise someone might think my dog did it.

I get mad because I know they will think my dog dig it.

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