What Combination of Two Assault Rifles Matches Your Personality?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
3 min
What Combination of Two Assault Rifles Matches Your Personality?
Image: David De Lossy/DigitalVision/Getty Images, Klaus Vedfelt/DigitalVision/Getty Images

About This Quiz

Ask anyone who has handles enough firearms and they'll tell you every gun has a distinct personality. Some guns are very much a product of the time of their genesis: the assault weapons invented by the US after WW2 reflected a realization that having a high-caliber assault rifle didn't make sense in the way wars were fought, especially when you're talking about an army that has automatic weapons. The Tommy Gun was thus replaced, and the M-16 became the grandfather of all modern-day American assault weapons.

Go back to the Revolutionary War, and assault weapons were little different from hunting weapons; accurate only at close range and at that, only about 40% of the time, since few of them would have rifling. Today, the hand cannon has come a long way, going from a curiosity of elite European sportsmen to machines capable of manufacturing death on a scale appropriate to an age when social media can pinpoint your tastes with 90% accuracy.

Some guns were made for specific purposes, are hyper-focused on their intended purposes and have little use elsewhere. DARPA and Israel have each showed off guns that shoot around corners, or fire special rounds that lock onto a target and follow them like a heat-seeking missile. From the crude Browning Automatic Rifle, still in service, to the most advanced polycarbonate and ceramic rifles, assault rifles are as unique as people. Which two rifles make up your personality?

How old school are you?
Extremely
Somewhat
Not even a tiny bit!
Mostly

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How adaptable are you?
Not very
Fairly
Very!
Not at all

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Do your friends consider you reliable?
Absolutely 100%.
Mostly, yes.
No, I flake like a pastry.
Yes unless something serious is going on.

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Where do you store your guns?
Locker
Gun rack
Under my pillow
Shed

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How many guns do you have?
2
3
27
4

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What's the most recent thing you pointed your gun at?
Target
Skeet
Everything!
Bird

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Have you ever had your gun go off when you didn't expect it?
I can't even imagine how that would happen.
Never
Yeah, more than you'd think.
Once

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Do you like to change it up, just for the sake of it?
Not for the sake of it, no.
No, but I can deal.
Yes, it's fun!
I have done, but I don't any more.

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What current war would you like to win?
Boko Haram
Syria
This digital one we're having with Russia.
Yemen

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What historical battle would you like to win?
Waterloo
Stalingrad
Agincourt
Midway

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How fast can you reload?
Basically instantly
Average speed
Depends on the weapon
Above average speed

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Have you served in the military?
Yes, two tours.
No.
No, but I am a mercenary for a living.
Yes, I'm going career.

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Do you love taking risks?
I take them every so often.
I do not like or dislike them.
Yes, for no reason usually.
I hate them with every fiber of my being.

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When you shoot at a target, how good is your grouping (that is, how close together the bullets generally hit)?
Excellent
Average
Very erratic
Above average

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At what age did you first learn to shoot?
9
15
21
12

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How long does it take you to disassemble and clean your gun?
5 minutes
15 minutes
An hour
10 minutes

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Do you secretly fantasize about stopping a bad guy?
I did once, but it was because I tripped him.
That'd be cool, but no.
Yeah, constantly.
Not really.

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Are you on the side of the law?
Absolutely
Of course
Nah
Yes, unless it is wrong.

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Do you have an eye for an opportunity?
Not really
Not in advance but when they come along, I figure it out.
I sure do!
Once in a while

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Do you do things by the book?
Unless there is a reason not to.
Of course, there is no other way.
Screw the book!
Yes, I like the book.

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Can you soldier on no matter what?
Of course!
If I have enough time for "self-care."
I can until I fall apart.
Generally, yes.

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Do you tend to speak up when you see someone doing wrong?
Yes, if it's safe to do so.
If I can't then I at least check on whoever was hurt.
Of course, especially if it is not dangerous.
No, I know I should but I don't.

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What's your favorite movie genre?
Period drama
Romance
Sci-fi
Action advneture

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What sort of house do you want to live in?
Ranch house
Surburban house
Houseboat
Rowhouse

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How do you like to get around?
Car
Horse
Hoverboard
Bike

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What heroic scar do you have?
Arm scar
Appendix scar
Terrifying facial scar
I don't have any.

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Which toy is the best toy?
Model railway.
Lego!
Playstation
Model airplane

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Can you carry a lot of dead weight?
About 150 lbs, yes.
About 100 lbs.
Not really!
About 70 lbs.

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What drink do you love?
Beer
Cointreau
Cocktail
Wine

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What kind of dog do you have?
Labrador
Collie
Pug
St. Bernard

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You Got:

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