What's the Military Nickname That Perfectly Matches Your Personality?

By: Torrance Grey
Estimated Completion Time
5 min
What's the Military Nickname That Perfectly Matches Your Personality?
Image: shutterstock

About This Quiz

No matter the branch (Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines or Coast Guard), the military generates a couple of things in vast numbers. These include rules, regulations, and acronyms (e.g., CENTCOM for "Central Command") ... and nicknames! Some of the history's most famous military leaders had them. Douglas MacArthur, one of America's heroes of the Pacific in WWIII, was called "Dugout Doug" as a sign of his willingness to get down and dirty with his troops. The lesser-known general Mark Clark, also a WWII veteran, was called "Contraband" in his West Point days for his ability to smuggle snacks into the barracks. On the Navy side, we have Admiral William Halsey, called "Bull" by the press. 

But nicknames aren't just for the top brass. At West Point, for example, all plebes (first-year cadets) are required to give each other nicknames as a bonding exercise. Because of the number of cadets, and the fact they're still relative strangers to each other, many of these handles are simply last names, e.g., "Boyd." Later, however, soldiers who are in the field and the barracks with each other often earn truly inventive nicknames, based on their personality, their behavior, and their unique strengths. 

Ever wondered what your military nickname would be? We've got a quiz that'll narrow down the possibilities and assign you one. Just answer honestly, and then wear your new moniker with pride!

What drew you (or would draw you) into military service?
The clear-cut rules and expectations
It looks great on a resume.
The chance for adventure and friend-making
The challenge of it

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Which of these branches of the military did you, or would you, serve in?
Army
Navy
Marines
Air Force
Coast Guard

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Which of these branches of the Army are you best suited for?
Military Police
Aviation
Infantry
Intelligence

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Which of these American presidents do you most admire?
John F. Kennedy
Dwight D. Eisenhower
Andrew Jackson
Barack Obama

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Are you happy with your level of education?
Yes, I have what I need.
Of course! I couldn't wait to get out of school.
I'll go back as needed to advance my goals.
I mostly educate myself. It's a lifelong process.

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How much money would you like to earn someday?
Enough to have a nice home and vehicle
Honestly, money isn't that important to me.
Enough to pay for adventure trips and cool toys
Quite a lot, because income reflects the respect of your peers.

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Which of these values would you say your family instilled in you?
Loyalty
Ambition
Love of learning
Responsibility

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You've got a free half-hour before lights-out. What do you do with it?
Study a manual for officer candidates
Sneak over to the women's barracks
Make sure my rucksack's tidily packed up
Read a bit of Euclid's "Elements"

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It's breakfast time! If you could have anything, what would you like to eat?
Anything that won't drip on my clothes - no runny eggs!
I don't care; I've smuggled lots of snacks into the barracks!
Something balanced, plus coffee for mental sharpness
Whatever's on offer; I've got other things to think about.

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Which of these kinds of music are you most likely to listen to?
Chamber music
Jazz or classical
Rap metal
I'll give any kind of music a try.

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Do you like to dance?
No, I have two left feet.
Well, it's an important social skill.
Oh yeah! I love to show off my moves.
I try, but I can be a little stiff.

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At what age would you like to get married?
Younger is better. A good helpmate is key to success.
When I meet someone who shares my values
When I meet someone who stimulates and challenges me
Possibly never!

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What are you looking for in a spouse or long-term companion?
Someone who'll challenge me to aim higher
Sometime neat and tidy. Is that shallow?
Someone who's always up for an adventure
Someone fascinating to talk to

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What's an ideal first date for you?
Coffee and conversation. I want to see where they're coming from in life.
Bungee jumping. Gotta see if they can keep up with me!
A trip to a museum
A walk in the woods or on the beach

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You've only got 30 minutes to clean house before your date arrives. What do you do?
Hurriedly do as much as I can.
Close the doors to the bedroom and bathroom and just tidy the front room.
Call and arrange to meet somewhere else.
My place is always clean. I'll just walk through and spot-check to be sure.

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You're hiking after sunset and hear a rustling in the bushes. What do you do?
Plunge into the underbrush and find out what it is.
Confer with my hiking companions about what to do.
Stand very still and hope it goes away.
Analyze the noise and figure out what kind of creature it is.

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Do you consider yourself good at cooking?
Meh. There's so much cleanup afterward!
No, but someday I'd like to really get into it. It's a fascinating hobby.
I could burn water, tbh.
Yes, because I like to host dinner parties.

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At a well-stocked shoe store, which of these are you likely to buy?
A shoe with an advanced, supportive design
Engineer's boots, hopefully with steel toes
The best "investment shoe" I can afford.
Classic oxfords in black or brown

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What kind of pet would you like to own?
Something that doesn't shed; maybe a reptile
Something exotic. Is a lion a possibility?
A smart dog, like an Australian Shepherd
I'm not sure I'd be home enough to take care of one.

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What genre of movie do you like the most?
A romance or comedy
A twisty thriller with a surprise ending
An action epic
I don't have a lot of time for movies.

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How large is your circle of friends?
I have at least a half-dozen good buddies.
I've cultivated a wide social circle; we're not all intimate, though.
I spend time with two or three good friends.
Really, there's just one close friend who gets me.

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Which of these 2000s shows did you like the most?
"How I Met Your Mother"
"House M.D."
"Family Guy"
I don't really watch television.

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Which of these sports stars do you most admire?
Tim Tebow
David Beckham
Conor McGregor
Does grandmaster Garry Kasparov count?

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Which of these is your favorite wardrobe accessory?
A statement wristwatch
A trucker cap
Does a Swiss Army knife count?
Does a shoeshine kit count?

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Imagine you're back in school, and participation in a sport is mandatory. What would you sign up for?
Swimming
Cross-country running
Football
Golf (if the school's that well-funded)

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Which of these solitary workouts would you most enjoy?
Rock climbing. Don't say I need a buddy; I can keep myself safe!
Lifting weights. It's hardcore!
Swimming. It's so peaceful and clean.
I don't see a point in working out without also bonding with an exercise partner.

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How do you feel about public speaking?
I actually enjoy it.
If I'm well-dressed, I'll be confident enough to get through it.
I might not be charismatic, but I'll have all the facts and figures.
Oh God, shoot me now.

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What kind of cooking are you most likely to pursue?
Japanese cooking; I love the delicate vegetable carvings.
Molecular gastronomy
Grilling
Classic French cuisine

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How do you feel about technology?
It fascinates me.
It annoys me.
I generally like it; I don't want to make a career of it.
I find it useful, that's all.

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Which of these classic books would you have stuffed into your rucksack?
"How To Win Friends and Influence People"
DC's "Superman," No. 1.
A biography of Elon Musk
"The Great Gatsby"

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You Got: