How Hardcore Are You?

By: Zoe Samuel

How Hardcore Are You?
Image: Graiki / Moment / Getty Images

About This Quiz

Some people are hardcore, and the rest of us know those people when we see them. They're in the gym, benching objects that most of us couldn't lift an inch. They're in the office, taking the big risks and usually getting the big rewards. They're out there jumping out of places, dangling from ropes on the sides of cliffs, and collecting injuries and bruises that they merely shrug off before striking out once more for the far horizon. When things go down, hardcore people are also typically the people who end up getting punched and doing the punching.

Still, being hardcore requires more than just being a great big lout who likes to start (or finish) fights. It's about being tough in multiple ways: mentally, physically and emotionally. It's about admitting to yourself that you're scared, but continuing doing what has to be done. It's about knowing when to open up and let another person in, and not being afraid to trust even when you've been hurt. After all, nothing is more hardcore than living an authentic life in a world that often demands precisely the opposite.

Just how hardcore are you? It's time to find out!

When was the last time you cried?
My doctor says my tear ducts have closed up.
I don't remember.
Within the last month
I'm crying now!

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Look, a puppy! What do you think of its little face?
Eh
Aw, that's cute.
I'd smoosh its little face!
Come to me little puppy, I will love you forever!

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Everyone needs a hobby. What's yours?
Iceberg climbing
Jujitsu
Extreme knitting
Pottery

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What's the best genre of movie to relax to?
Horror
Thriller
Drama
Comedy

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You meet a new cat. How long before it lets you rub its belly?
I don't want to rub its belly, honestly.
A few days
A few hours
Instantly

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What is the dominant color palette in your house?
Black and white
Jewel tones
Earth tones
Pastels

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What British accent do you feel best represents you?
Glaswegian
Cockney
Brummie
Queen's English

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You have to cover a song unexpectedly. Whose music will you use?
Megadeth
Franz Ferdinand
The Beatles
Britney Spears

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What's the most extreme thing you've ever survived?
I was once kidnaped by a militia in Kazakhstan.
I was once hit by a bus.
I once had measles.
I bumped my knee.

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Remember that puppy we mentioned earlier? It's sad. What do you do?
Give it a pat on the head.
Give it a snack.
Cuddle it.
Give over my life to ensuring that it is no longer sad, with toys, cuddles, snacks and kisses.

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You're late for work and the train is very full. You can take your chances running to the next car, or push an old lady out of the way. Which do you choose?
I shove her and I like it!
I bark at the lady to move.
I edge around the old lady. I'm sorry, I hate myself, but I'm late!
I run for the next car.

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When you lost your last milk tooth, how did it finally exit your mouth?
I tied floss to it, then to the doorknob. Then I slammed the door.
I hit it during a vigorous game of tag.
I wobbled it right out of there.
I woke up and it was out.

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A big man falls down in the street and bangs his head. A passing doctor asks for help to hold him still while she tends to him. What do you do?
Hold him! How often do you get to do that?
Get at least one other person to help, then hold him.
Film it. Duh!
Run away.

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Which generation do you think is the most hardcore, and why?
Greatest Generation. They beat the worst batch of Nazis ever made!
Silent Generation. All the great Civil Rights leaders belonged to it!
Millennials. They're on the business end of automation AND climate change.
Baby Boomers. They bought homes with federal assistance, went to affordable colleges, and had salaried union jobs. Hardcore!

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What punishment did you get when you were naughty as a child?
Smacks
Grounding and loss of privileges
Time out
Firm words

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Who would play you in a movie?
Christopher Lee
Jason Statham
Meryl Streep
Anne Hathaway

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You've been ordered by a judge to perform community service, but you can choose what you do. What's your preference?
Help in a jail.
Pick up trash by the road.
Help in an old folks' home.
Help in a kindergarten.

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What dance genre do you think most perfectly encapsulates humanity's deepest flaws?
Hip-hop
Burlesque
Jazz
Line dance

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Which vice do you like to indulge in the most often?
I can't say it on a family website, but it's intense.
Something you can't do until you're 21
Video gaming for hours and hours!
A cheeky cup of tea ... with caffeine!

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If you won a holiday anywhere in the world, where would you go?
Yemen
Antarctica
Argentina
Italy

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A very large, terrifying spider is between you and a donut you want. Can you soldier on through?
I will kill that spider and get that donut.
I will ignore that spider and get that donut.
I will run very fast and get that donut!
I didn't want the donut that badly anyway. Sigh.

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You're building a crib for your friend's baby, who is due home from the hospital on Friday. While hammering on Thursday, you smash your finger. Will the crib get done?
So help me, this crib will be done, and it will be the spitting image of the Millennium Falcon.
It'll be done, but it might be home a smidge late!
It'll be done a couple of days late!
It'll be done in a few weeks.

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Have you ever achieved lucid dreaming (when you are dreaming, but you know it is a dream)?
All the time. I control my subconscious!
A few times, but I can't control how it goes, I just know it's a dream.
Once or twice, which honestly only makes it worse.
No, that sounds scary.

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A man harasses you in the street. What's going to happen next?
Oh, he's in trouble now. It's going to hurt.
I will verbally destroy him.
I will tweet angrily about it.
I will run away. I'm scared.

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What mythological creature have you always thought you'd quite like to have for a pet?
Dragon, duh
Hippogriff
Chimera
Unicorn

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Have you ever made someone cry on purpose?
Yes. It was fun!
Yes, from time to time - but only when they deserve it.
Once, because they had bullied another person.
Honestly, I'm not sure I've even made someone cry by mistake.

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How often do your regrets overcome you?
Never!
Rarely
Monthly, but only briefly
More than weekly

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Out sailing, you have a serious cut and someone just dropped the first aid kit overboard. What will you do?
Pour spirits on it!
Live with it
I have Band-Aids in my purse!
Cry and insist we return to shore

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You've got terrible diarrhea during a very important phone interview. What are the odds they're going to know about it?
Zero
Low
High, unless I hang up.
I will have to reschedule the call.

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There's very bad turbulence on your flight. How do you cope?
Was there? I didn't realize, I slept through it.
I ignore it.
I take a pill for that!
I cling on in terror and cry.

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