How Smart Is Your Dog?

By: Ian Fortey
Estimated Completion Time
4 min
How Smart Is Your Dog?
Image: Fernando Trabanco Fotografía / Moment / Getty Images

About This Quiz

According to statistics, there are nearly 90 million dogs in America, which is more than double the entire population of humans in Canada. That's a lot of pups. 

And no doubt, if you've met more than, say, four of those dogs, you know that every pup has a unique personality, and some are more on the ball than others. After all, some dogs can be trained to aid law enforcement, sniff out cancer or find people who have been lost after disasters. Dogs can do amazing things. 

Then there are the dogs who get lost trying to go from the kitchen to the living room. Sure, some of it is based on who trained the dog and how, but is that all of it? Like some people, some dogs just seem not to be good at thinking so well sometimes. That's not meant to be an insult — your dog is still probably really great even if it's not the brightest bulb on the tree. You just need to be honest. Not every dog is a Rover Einstein.

Where do you think your dog fits on the scale? Furry genius or butt-sniffing disappointment? If you want to find out, then tell us about that pup. We'll let you know if they make the grade. We promise not to be too ruff on them.


Your dog knows its name, right?
Of course!
Most of the time
Eh, who's to say?
Only when it wants to
How many commands can your dog follow on the first try?
Over a dozen
A few
Pretty much none
It's not a matter of "can," but how many "will" it follow.
If your dog sees a cat across the street, what is it going to do?
Nothing
It might get a little excited.
Run like the wind
Depends on how much it likes the cat.

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Would your dog make a good guard dog?
An excellent guard dog
It'd take some work.
Nope
I want to say no to this.
Is your dog disciplined enough to play fetch?
Obviously
Sometimes my dog won't give the ball back, but usually.
Not particularly
Some days
Does your dog like to play with the other pups at the dog park?
Loves it
Usually
Sometimes, but sometimes things get a little out of control.
My dog isn't a player.

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How would your dog do on an agility course?
My dog would smoke it.
Maybe OK. Depends on how complex it was.
My dog would probably nap on the course.
My dog does not work like that.
When you take the dog out for a walk, who leaves the house first when you open the door?
I do.
You know, I have no idea.
My dog
Sometimes I have to carry the dog out.
How often does your dog have accidents in the house?
Never
It's extremely rare.
More than I'd like
What about the ones I think are on purpose?

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If your dog was a cartoon pooch, which one would it be?
Brian Griffin
Scooby-Doo
Odie
Marmaduke
Where does your dog sleep at night?
My dog gets crated at night.
On the bed
It has its own bed.
That's a good question.
What kind of diet is your pup on?
Raw food
I buy some good quality stuff.
Just regular dog food
My dog eats everything it can reach.

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Is your dog a barker?
Not unless it's told to speak
Sometimes, when it gets surprised
It's pretty noisy.
Sometimes yes, sometimes no
When your pup is on the leash, does it pull off in whatever direction it wants to go?
Never
Only if something surprises it
Yeah, if it wants to see something
Once in a while
How is your dog during a thunderstorm?
Cool as a cucumber
The thunder will probably startle it.
Cowering with me like a baby
It tends to vanish.

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What does your dog do when a guest comes into your home?
Not much
My dog will probably come over to say hello.
My dog will rush them.
Depends on who the guest is.
How does your dog let you know it's time to go out?
It stands at the door and waits.
It'll dance around expectantly.
The poop on the floor is a good sign, usually.
I have to guess most of the time.
If you call your dog from another room, will it come right away?
Always
It might take a second try.
Sometimes
If it's in another room, it's busy.

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Does your dog try to chase squirrels or birds when it's outside?
Never
Only if one is super close by
Very often
Not that I can recall
Can your dog go off-leash at the beach?
Yes
Yeah, but you need to keep a close watch on it.
Oh no, that'd be a bad idea.
My dog has never been to the beach.
If you're having some tasty burgers for dinner, will your dog beg for some?
My dog doesn't beg.
Probably
My dog will steal some if you're not careful.
My dog doesn't actually like burgers.

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Has your dog ever gotten aggressive with a person?
When they were commanded to
My dog has growled and barked at some strangers.
My dog bit someone once.
My dog isn't so much aggressive as rude.
If you hid your dog's favorite toy, how long would it take for your dog to find it again?
Seconds
It could take a little while.
It might never find it.
Depends on where I hid it.
If you want to teach your dog a trick, like rolling over, how long is it going to take for them to get it down?
Probably within a week or so
Could take up to a month.
Good luck with that.
Could be slow, could be fast. Could be never.

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What do you think your dog does when you're not home?
It's usually crated when I'm out.
Probably all kinds of weird stuff
Makes a mess
Sleeps
Does your dog have a favorite flavor that you're aware of?
Chicken
Cheese
Bacon
Peanut butter
Which of these toys would your dog be most likely to grab if they had the option?
A knotted rope
A tennis ball
A squeaky toy
My sock

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How many walks a day do you go on with your dog?
Three
One
Depends on the day
Two
Does your dog like other animals that aren't dogs?
It gets along well with everything.
Most animals
Sometimes
It seems to like cats.
How long can your dog play, when given the chance?
All day
A few hours
Hard to say. It gets distracted pretty easily.
Its whole life is a game.

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