Oh no they didn't: The wedding etiquette quiz!

LIFESTYLE

By: Olivia Seitz

7 Min Quiz

Image: shyutterstock

About This Quiz

If you love love, then you also love weddings. And why shouldn't you? Your friends or family are finally getting married to their soulmates, there's amazing food and an open bar, and love is in the air. What's not to love? But we know that the married couple-to-be won't be loving you if you fail to adhere to the wedding rules that were given to us by some mystical being. Just how well do you know the do's and don'ts of weddings?

Are you that wedding guest who would dare show up in white (unless the bride and groom specifically ask)? Do you take it upon yourself to open the buffet or sit wherever you want despite the assigned seating? Do you not bring a gift but go home with three take-away plates? Are you one of those people who gets too tipsy and ends up flirting with the new bride or groom?

These are the things that could really ruin someone's special day, and we want to find out if you're guilty of them or if you move like a smooth operator. We want to know just how much you know about wedding etiquette. Will you be invited to another wedding in your lifetime? Or was the one you just attended your last? Let's find out!

How soon should the bride and groom announce their engagement?

Couples should refrain from making an announcement on social media until after they call (or visit) parents and close family members. This will prevent them from feeling offended that they were not informed sooner.

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Which of the following is not required on the invitations?

Invitations are often issued in a fancy script such as calligraphy, but the couple is free to choose whatever invitation style they please. As long as necessary information is included, they're in the clear.

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Which of the following guests should be allowed a "plus one" invitation?

Guests who are married, engaged, living together or in the wedding party should be allowed a plus-one if that person is not already on the guest list. Otherwise, it's optional to allow guests to bring a date.

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Which of the following wedding guests are not typically invited to the rehearsal dinner?

The wedding party, the officiant and the immediate family are typically invited to the rehearsal dinner. In large families, not all siblings are necessarily invited - invitations are at the discretion of the couple.

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It would be impolite to...

Some people wish to avoid the ceremony for various reasons - it's too long, it's religious, etc. - but doing so is an insult to the couple being married. Guests are expected to stay for both the ceremony and the reception unless special circumstances arise.

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Which of the following is appropriate destination wedding etiquette for the bride and groom?

Destination weddings require a little more information from the Mr. and Mrs. To-Be. Couples should consider which, if any, travel expenses they can cover for their guests. They should also plan to include guests in events like rehearsal dinners or welcome parties.

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Which of the following is not necessary to give a wedding vendor (such as your DJ, photographer, etc.)?

Wedding vendors work hard to make the wedding as flawless as possible, and it's customary to make sure that they are well fed (this ensures they have enough energy to do their jobs well). It's a good idea to give them any specific instructions before the event begins, and it's important to designate someone to hand out tips before they leave (an exception is if you have a direct contract with the person providing the service - in this case, tips are optional from the standpoint of etiquette).

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If you are planning to remarry, who should learn of the decision first?

Etiquette for remarriage dictates notifying any children first. After the couple discusses the plan with their children, they can notify the rest of their family and friends as desired.

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At what point is it generally acceptable for a guest to depart?

It's acceptable for guests to leave after the cutting of the cake; if an earlier departure is necessary, then it should be marked with an apology and best wishes to the newlyweds.

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Who should be given a corsage?

Corsages for grandmothers are usually small and neutral so that they will match whatever dress the grandmother chooses to wear. Mothers' corsages are expected to be coordinated with what they are wearing.

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Who is permitted to host a shower for the bride?

Coworkers and friends are free to organize a shower for the bride independently, but traditionally the bride's family is not supposed to organize one. It's seen as a bid for more gifts.

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What is the acceptable time frame to send out thank-you notes after the wedding?

While there is a common belief that newlyweds have a year to send out thank-you cards for the gifts they received, traditional etiquette dictates waiting no more than three months.

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Which of the following locations would be acceptable for a strictly "formal" wedding?

Weddings can be formal, semi-formal or informal. If formal, they are supposed to take place in one of the three mentioned locations.

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What is the appropriate age for bridesmaids?

An interesting quirk of wedding etiquette is that bridesmaids should be close to the bride in age; older relatives and friends should be given alternate roles in the wedding.

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Who is expected to pay for the flower girl's dress?

The flower girl's parents are expected to provide her dress, which ought to be similar but not identical to the bridesmaid dresses. The bride and groom are responsible for determining what the flower girl will actually carry.

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Who is expected to serve as the best man in a wedding?

While wedding etiquette is loose in this instance, it is traditional for the groom to choose the brother to whom he is closest to act as the best man. If he doesn't have any brothers, then he is expected to choose a cousin or very close friend, although some are even known to choose their fathers!

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Which of the following is not the duty of a best man?

Best men have an extensive list of duties, mostly pertaining to the groom. One that has recently become custom is the organization of a bachelor party.

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Which of the following is traditionally the expense of the groom's family?

Traditionally, the bride's family pays for the wedding and reception, while the groom's family pays for the honeymoon. Today, what is and is not expected of each family depends more on individual circumstances and the wishes of the engaged couple.

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When the groom's cake is cut up into decorative boxes for guests to take home, how many pieces is each guest allowed?

It is considered extraordinarily rude for guests to take more than one box unless they are bringing it to a family member who could not attend the wedding but was invited.

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If the bride, her family, or her bridal party are helping to organize a shower, who can they invite?

It's considered bad manners to invite someone to a bridal shower who you aren't inviting to the wedding. If the shower is organized independently - for example, by your co-workers - then this rule does not apply.

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How should you let guests know that children are not invited?

Holding a children-free wedding may be unpopular with some of your guests, so it's important to notify them tactfully. Invitations should be addressed to the adults, and there should only be room for the invited adults to RSVP. You can then follow up with an explanation on your wedding website and verbally as needed.

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Is it appropriate for guests to take photos at the wedding?

Guests should silence their phones and refrain from taking videos and photographs - the couple will have already engaged a photographer. If the couple want friends and family to take their own photos and video, they can make an announcement on their wedding site or share a wedding hashtag for attendees to use.

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Where is it appropriate to discuss specific wedding plans?

Details of wedding planning should be private knowledge (unless the bride has already made the information public knowledge on social media). Private messaging apps, texting and phone calls are all appropriate ways to discuss plans with the bride.

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How should you RSVP to a wedding invitation?

Each couple will have a preference for collecting responses and will list your available options on the invitation. If they ask that you respond on their website or by phone, for example, then those are the most appropriate methods to use.

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At which of the following events are guests not expected to bring gifts?

The engagement party is supposed to be a time to celebrate with the couple; gift-giving will come later, but is never obligatory.

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If the couple is using a registry, when should they finish setting it up?

Registries, if used, are ideally completed by the time invitations are sent out. Since registries are optional, there is no fixed date by which they must be complete.

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Where should couples share registry information?

Since gifts are not strictly required of guests, placing registry information on the wedding invitation is considered impolite. Couples can place a link to their website on the invitation, however, and update the site with links to their registries.

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Which color is impolite to wear to a wedding?

It's never acceptable to wear a white dress to a wedding without the bride's express permission, and even then it's not recommended. While black used to be socially unacceptable, the rule against wearing black is mostly outdated.

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How early should ushers arrive at the ceremony venue?

Ushers should arrive with forty-five minutes to spare so that they can guide guests to the appropriate seats. Often, it's helpful for ushers to be "assigned" to certain family members and friends, based on who they know.

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Can the bride and groom skip a traditional receiving line?

One way or another, the couple should make sure to greet all wedding guests. Many couples choose to circulate the tables during the reception to greet and chat with guests.

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Which of the following is a serious breach of etiquette?

It is extremely impolite to ask a couple for an invitation to their wedding. A polite response to such a request is to thank the offending person for their enthusiasm, but tell them that the guest list is yet to be finalized.

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How should a bridal shower be handled in the case of remarriage?

Guests who attended the first shower should not be invited to the second. Alternatively, one could hold an afternoon tea or similar event and specify that no gifts should be brought.

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How should guests be notified if a wedding is canceled after the invitation is mailed?

It's best for close friends and relatives to call guests and inform them that the wedding will no longer be taking place. The calls can be followed up by a mailed announcement, if there is sufficient time.

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When should wedding presents be opened?

When gifts are sent to the couple's or the couple's parents' home, the gifts may be opened ahead of time or after the wedding, at the couple's discretion. Envelopes should be saved until after the marriage takes place, and none of the gifts should be used beforehand so that they can be returned if the wedding is called off.

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Who walks down the aisle last during the wedding procession?

A typical wedding procession begins with the bridesmaids (paired with groomsmen, if desired; otherwise, the groomsmen stand next to the groom at the front of the venue). These are followed by the maid of honor, the flower girl, the ring bearer, and finally, the bride, escorted by her father or another important person in her life of her choosing.

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