How Much Do You Know About Being An Au Pair?

An au pair is a domestic assistant, one that hails from abroad. Many families rely heavily on an au pair to make it through day-to-day life.

An au pair is hired by a host family. The family pays (or should pay) the au pair for their domestic services.

In many instances, host families depend on au pairs for child care. This assistance almost always takes on many other housework duties, too, from cleaning to some meal preparation.

Traditionally, au pairs are female. And in some places, they simply cannot be males.

Au pairs are almost always young women. Many of them want to explore the world, and they offer their services in exchange for the opportunity to serve a host family.

Many au pairs really want to improve their foreign language skills. They travel abroad to obtain those skills by using a new language on a daily basis.

In exchange for their time and dedication, au pairs receive free room and board. Hopefully that doesn’t mean you're stuck in a dark closet in the attic.

The overarching theme of the au pair concept is that it's a cultural exchange. It's a chance for very different people to get deep insights into each other's world views and perspectives.

"Au pair" means "on equal footing." The idea is that the arrangement benefits both parties equally. Sometimes it works out that way… sometimes it does not.

Because they receive free room and board, au pairs don't make a lot of money. They basically get just enough cash per week to help them pay for a few personal expenses.

Au pairs have only been around since the post-WWII era. A complex combination of changing social attitudes and child care needs caused the concept to quickly spread in popularity.

Prior to the World War era, servants were common throughout Europe. But major shifts in society meant that no one wanted to be treated as a servant - the au pair arrangement neatly helped families with their many chores while providing better social status for young workers.

Breaking bread together is regarded as a cornerstone of the au pair relationship. These young women typically take their meals as part of the family.

In many cases, au pairs cook for the children they supervise. But mom and dad? They can make their own meals, thank you very much.

Many au pairs skip this part … and many of them come to regret it. Contracts are important, and they are a good building block for an au pair relationship.

It's part of the setup - au pairs are almost always unmarried. And in some places, single status is a requirement to qualify as an au pair. And if, in the 21st century, that seems a bit sketchy to you, well, you're not the only one.

So you can't afford daycare? Don't trust the neighbors to babysit? Just get an au pair and you'll have cheap child care forever! This isn't always true, of course, but it does happen, and it's why some people argue against the au pair system.

It all started with a test run in the 1980s, and those au pairs worked out nicely. So the U.S. Au Pair Program launched in 1989 and has been active ever since.

In almost every case, au pairs are either in their teens or early 20s. In some places, rules prohibit au pairs from being over 30.

It's not really child care if the "kid" is 22. Host families typically have kids age 16 or younger. Au pairs that nab a family with a polite 16-year-old have it made.

Au pairs get sick just like everyone else, especially because they're picking up after your gross toddlers. When they're ill, they should get time recuperate without fear of repercussions.

Au pairs, in most places, aren't exactly full-time employees. They might work 30 hours per week and then spend the rest of their time studying or exploring.

Let's be honest, young students abroad are looking to learn and explore; they don't want to be your personal attendants. They do some child care and light housekeeping and that's about it.

Au pairs are already taking care of your two-legged pets. They don't have to watch over the four-legged ones if they don't want to.

Au pairs explicitly take up their adventure in part to master a new language. As such, no matter how busy they might be, the host family should help the au pair find time to attend a language course of some sort.

Au pair work hours are limited in many countries. Some unscrupulous families might try to skirt work limits by not counting "babysitting" towards weekly hours… but it definitely counts as work and should be logged as such.

Au pairs barely get paid more than pocket money during the week. If they're ill and can't work, they're still entitled to that pay.

Au pairs aren't walking daycare centers. If other families show up at the house, they can't just dump their children on the au pair and expect them to cooperate.

So you've always dreamed of having your own maid. Look elsewhere, because au pairs are not your personal servants.

The au pair relationship is necessarily rather intimate, as the workers help to run the household and take care of offspring. When the arrangement works, it's almost as if they are part of the family.