Play a Game of "Would You Rather" and We'll Guess Your Favorite NFL Team
By: Ian Fortey
Image: Pete Saloutos / Blend Images / Getty Images
About This Quiz
There are 32 teams in the National Football League, and every single one of them has a huge contingent of fans. Some teams have a legacy dating back a century at this point, and their fandom is hard earned over generations. Other teams are newer and have had to win fans either by proving their mettle on the gridiron or, in some cases, making those strategic decisions to draw in the best players from elsewhere in the league. And of course, some teams draw in fans based entirely on geography. If you live in Chicago, you love the Bears. It's that simple. Or is it?
NFL fandom can be a fickle thing, but there are the diehard fans out there who are loyal to their team no matter what. Fairweather fans come and go, but these fans are in it for the long haul. We're willing to bet that if you're a serious fan of at least one team in the NFL, we can figure out just who it is. And the method by which we will achieve this remarkable feat? A simple game of "would you rather." Now be honest, would you rather go through your life not knowing if we can guess your favorite NFL team, or will you take the quiz?
If you won a big cash prize would you rather have 75% of the money immediately or 100% paid out over five years?
I think I need that cash right now.
Getting money every year? I can handle that.
I'm in this for the long haul, I'll take the five years.
That's a tough call. I think I'll take the immediate cash.
It's your lucky day! You won a lifetime supply of your favorite snacks. Would you rather have Doritos or M&Ms?
There are more kinds of M&Ms so I pick those.
Can I get all the Doritos flavors? I'll pick them.
It looks like your boss has it in for you. Would you rather work all day Saturday, or work an extra hour every day during the week?
This is a terrible choice. I'll take the one hour days.
I'm already at work during the week so I'll take the extra hour.
I can't miss dinner. I'll work on Saturday.
I guess I get paid more if I work on Saturday, so I'll do that.
Suppose you're stuck someplace where you can't watch the football game. Would you rather watch baseball or basketball?
I'm up for a basketball game.
You know I'm watching baseball.
I'm not thrilled either way here. Basketball, I guess.
What time of year are all three of these sports on? Anyway, I'll watch baseball.
There's been a mishap in the laundry room. Would you rather have a bleach stain on your shirt or a hole in it?
A hole is just some air conditioning.
I don't want to freeze, I'll take the stain.
Holes just make you look like you don't care. Give me the bleach.
I could always sew up a hole, so that sounds good.
Relationships are never easy. Would you rather catch your partner cheating on you after they did it just a few times, or have it go on for years and you never find out?
You need some trust and honesty, so I'd want to know.
What I don't know won't hurt me.
It's totally going to be a rough day at work. Would you rather work for eight hours listening to an annoying mystery sound, or smelling a disgusting mystery smell?
Like a really disgusting smell? I'll take the sound.
I'd get used to the smell, right?
How bad could it smell? I'd still be able to concentrate.
Nature can be cruel. Would you rather be punched by a kangaroo or kicked by an emu?
Seriously? I'll take the punch.
How hard can a bird kick? I'll take the emu.
I'm 100% ready to fight a kangaroo.
One of the best parts of working is going on vacation. Would you rather take a luxury cruise or fly first class?
Let's fly, it'll get me where I'm going faster.
That cruise sounds nice and relaxing.
A cruise is like traveling in a hotel, I'll take that.
Cruises can get weird, I hear. I'll fly first class.
Some of us can't handle schedules at all. Would you rather always be 10 minutes late or a half hour early?
Those half hours will build up. I'll be late.
If you're late, you get fired. I'll be early.
It'd be way too boring to wait 30 minutes for everything. I choose to be late.
Being early makes you look like a go-getter, that can't be bad.
Can you believe there's been another incident in the laundry room? Would you rather all your shirts were a little too tight or way too loose?
I guess loose means comfortable, so I'll pick that.
I look good in a tight shirt.
Loose shirts are kind of fashionable, right? I'll take that.
Tight just gives me an excuse to stay in shape.
Reality can be hard to handle sometimes. Would you rather live a life of luxury in a virtual reality simulation, or live a life of ups and downs in the real world?
I can handle disappointment. Give me the real world.
Hey, if it seems real, then the virtual world sounds great.
For all I know I already live in a simulation, so I pick virtual reality.
The real world is all I need.
There's no accounting for taste. Would you rather do a shot of sriracha or do a shot of pure lemon juice?
I love the heat! Give me sriracha.
Lemon has vitamin C, give me that one.
I'll take some spice with that sriracha.
The sour from the lemon will go away faster, so I pick the lemon.
Everyone likes pets, but what if pets don't like you? Would you rather be attacked by every dog you meet or every cat you meet?
Cats are small. Bring 'em on.
Have you ever been scratched by a cat? I'll take the dogs.
An angry cat is insane. I pick dogs.
Dogs are mean. I'll pick cats.
Looks aren't everything but they have to count for something. Would you rather go through life with one big unibrow or no eyebrows at all?
I could draw on eyebrows, right? I'll go bald brow.
There's a good chance you're reading this on a mobile device. Would you rather have free wi-fi everywhere or never-ending battery life?
I already have wi-fi, so give me the battery.
I need that battery life, I'm using my phone constantly.
I like data, so I'll take the wi-fi.
I have plenty of chargers, so wi-fi sounds good.
Your personal chef is maybe not as good as he said he was. Would you rather eat boring, flavorless food for the rest of your life, or incredibly spicy food for every meal?
I love spice, bring it on.
Spicy for every meal would kill me. I'll go bland.
I'd rather have flavor, give me the spice.
Sometimes it's nice to live the high life. Would you rather have a personal chef or a personal chauffeur?
I like driving myself, so give me the chef.
I'm happy making my own meals, I'll take the driver.
I love to eat. Give me that chef.
Hell yeah, I want someone driving me around.
They say love hurts. Would you rather date someone who's a great lover but a boring conversationalist, or a great conversationalist but a poor lover?
I can talk to my friends. I need a good lover.
Sex isn't everything. Give me the good conversationalist.
You need more than a physical connection, so I choose someone I can talk to.
If there's no physical side, aren't you just friends? I'll choose the good lover.
This one's getting super deep. Would you rather be a hero in the Marvel Universe or the DC Universe?
I want to be an Avenger! Marvel all the way.
Superman is DC, sign me up.
I could be an X-man? I want Marvel.
Batman is DC, so that's where I'm going.
Sometimes we take our skills for granted. Would you rather lose the ability to read or the ability to write?
I can get audio books, but I'd like to still write.
Writing is really important, I need that ability.
If I can't read, I'd lose my mind.
Let's get apocalyptic. Would you rather take on a robot uprising or a zombie apocalypse?
I am so ready to take on zombies.
Robots? I'll short 'em out with a hose, no problem.
I've watched enough "Walking Dead" to know how to kill a zombie.
I think I could handle some robots.
No one really has control of their dreams. Would you rather your nightmares come to life or everyone else's nightmares?
I am not ready to face my fears, I'll face someone else's.
What if people have worse nightmares than I do? I'll face my own.
I have to pick mine, at least there will be fewer of them.
Everyone else's seems like a better choice.
Fine dining isn't for everyone. Would you rather eat nothing but hot dogs or hamburgers for the rest of your life?
You can really do a lot to a burger, so I pick that.
I feel like hot dogs would be more fun.
The radio can be unpredictable. Would you rather every song you hear from now on be '70s rock or '80s rock?
I feel like there were better bands in the '80s.
There were some great tunes in the '70s.
I hate the '80s. Give me '70s rock.
The weather is a cause for concern lately. Would you rather it always be a few degrees too hot to be comfortable or a few degrees too cold?
I can use A/C, so I pick the heat.
I'm used to the cold, I'll pick that one.
If it's too cold, you wear a sweater. I pick the cold.
I prefer the heat, to be honest.
Being human can be a little limiting. Would you rather be able to fly or be able to breathe underwater?
If you breathe underwater, you can find sunken treasure!
The freedom of flying is too appealing.
Breathing underwater would be incredible.
Fame is fleeting, but it still seems like fun. Would you rather be a famous singer or a famous actor?
I feel like actors can do more diverse work, so I'd do that.
I connect more with music, so a singer.
Since we're here for football, would you rather have a very short, very high-profile football career or a very long but mediocre one?
If I can make a big splash, I'll do that, even if it's short.
I'm in it for the long haul.
A long career means you're still getting paid.
High profile means you'd have more opportunities later, right? I pick that.
Houses are fine and good, but so is travel! Would you rather live in an RV or in a houseboat?
I like the idea of living on the water.
I could see America in an RV.
A houseboat is like living on a waterbed. I pick that.
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