Pretend You're Rich as Heck and We'll Guess the True Age of Your Soul

By: Zoe Samuel

Pretend You're Rich as Heck and We'll Guess the True Age of Your Soul
Image: moodboard/Cultura/GettyImages

About This Quiz

There is an expression for mature, enlightened people: old souls. Whether this description is literal, which posits the existence of an eternal soul, or merely figurative, the saying has deep resonance. To be an old soul means to be past the things that do not really matter. Letting the unimportant things slide, letting go of acquisitive impulses, and being content are the hallmarks of old souls.

Of course, it's hard to do those things when there is so much cool stuff for sale in our world! Even if one considers oneself an enlightened person, it is true to say that people find a way to develop more expensive tastes as their means improve; give a Spartan a few million dollars, and you'll see him driving a fancy car, wearing fancy clothes, and eating fancy food. Financial success is, in many ways, the truest test of one's self-control. To have the means to do anything, and choose to do nothing, is antithetical to most human impulses.

So how would you behave if you just inherited a billion dollars from some long-lost relative who always felt a special connection to you? Would you blow it all in one place? Would you try to do good in the world? Would you lavish your friends and family in riches or hoard it? Take this quiz, and together we will find out.

What job would you have, being super rich?
I'd be a full time philanthropist.
I'd work for a charity, at a low level. Soup kitchens, etc.
I'd chase my dream job.
I'd retire!

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What would you do to help our your dearest friends?
I'd help them set up their dream businesses.
I'd pay off their credit cards.
I'd send them on their bucket list vacation.
I'd buy them the best gold jewelry.

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How much money would you donate to charity?
As much as possible
Most of it. Who needs all that?
Probably half of it. I can get by on $500,000,000.
None of it! What's mine is mine!

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What sort of dwelling would you prefer?
A house in a safe neighborhood
A ranch out in the middle of nowhere
A mansion in the fancy part of town
A penthouse in the middle of a city

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How defined is your monthly budget?
Clearly. It wouldn't be far off from where I am in reality.
Pretty well defined. Just a slightly inflated version of what I have now.
Not well defined. I mean, it's not like I'm going to spend it all!
No budget! I make it rain!

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How up to date is your wardrobe?
I'd own well-made clothing that would last, but I don't really care about fashion.
I'd have a couple fashionable outfits, but that's all.
Pretty up to date
It's on the bleeding edge.

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How much money do you spend on alcohol per week?
None
None for me, thanks. Maybe some if I have friends over.
A couple hundred, for the house and going out
Thousands. I'm drinking the finest champagne.

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What kind of transportation would you own?
A Volvo
A Mercedes E-Class. Safe and reliable.
Something a little flashy and fun, like an Audi R8.
A Bugatti. I an afford it!

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How much of the value of your dwelling is derived from how fashionable the neighborhood is?
None
A little
Some, I guess.
A lot of it!

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Would you be willing to date someone you really liked if you knew your cohort of friends didn't approve?
Of course, if I really loved them.
Probably, if I liked them a lot.
I'm sure my friends have good reasons. I'd hear them out.
No way! I wouldn't date someone who would make me look like a loser!

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Would you do anything to or about the people who wronged you, in your past?
No. Let it go.
No, that's a waste.
Maybe I'd let them know I was loaded.
I'd hire mimes to torment them.

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Would you remain in your current field of work?
Almost certainly, at first
Maybe, but I think I'd have my eye on something else.
No, I'd quit and do something else immediately.
I'd quit in a way that would ruin me if I weren't rich.

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What sort of activity would you take part in on a vacation?
Meditation
Surfing
Tanning
Clubbing

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Where would you like to travel on an all expense paid trip of a lifetime?
Someplace really off the beaten path
Someplace calming, like a spa
Someplace exciting, like an adventure holiday in The Outback
Someplace I can do a lot of shopping like Monaco!

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Who would be the first person you'd treat to something wonderful?
Whichever of my parents needed it the most
My mentor
My best friend
A romantic interest

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What would you do to help our your family members?
I'd pay off their debts.
I'd set up trusts.
I'd pay for their health insurance, etc.
I'd buy them houses and cars!

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Would you do anything nice for friends who aren't super close to you?
I'd probably help them on specific projects, if they asked.
I'd give them something to help with short term problems if that's a thing they need.
I'd take them to dinner, etc.
No way! I'm not wasting money on hangers on.

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How private would you be?
Fairly private, but not reclusive
Very private, almost reclusive
Reclusive
Totally public, with a reality show

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Would you move?
If there are security concerns
Not at first
Yeah, but I'd be careful about it.
Yes, instantly!

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Will you abandon any of your friends when you get rich?
Probably a couple, who would identify themselves as gold diggers
Maybe the really negative ones who I'm only in it with for the networking
No. That would be awful.
Of course! I want rich friends, like supermodels and people with names combining "Jeff" with "Bezos."

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With what sort of activities would you fill your days?
Reading. Thinking.
Painting. Taking classes.
Working out. Traveling.
Shopping. Flexing.

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How much traveling would you do?
As much as needed, but not any for the sake of it
More than the average Joe
A lot more than I do now
Tons. I'd fly every weekend.

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How often would you replace your phone?
When it broke or became a liability
When the contract was up
When the new one comes out
When I get tired of the color

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On which of these luxuries are you most likely to spend money?
Time
Land
Staff
Bling

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Could you love a destitute person?
Of course
It depends. Are they destitute because of something they did? Are they responsible?
I dunno. They might just be into me for my money.
No gold diggers for me!

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What kind of tea or coffee do you prefer?
None, thanks. I feel too wired from them.
Just some regular coffee or builder's tea, thanks.
Fancy tea. It warms the soul.
Expensive coffee, so I can snob at the poor people.

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How would you gamble?
On safe bonds
On index funds
On cards
On dice

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What dream would you chase?
Contentment
A big, healthy, happy family
A killer app business
Being famous for being famous

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How would you promote your views?
I wouldn't.
I'd publish papers.
I'd donate to organizations that would do that.
I'd buy my way onto TV.

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What one thing would you most want to do with your newfound wealth?
Make the world a better place with it.
Give most of it away to worthy charities.
Pay off my debts and pursue my dream career.
I'd want lots of plastic surgery.

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You Got:

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