Rate These Auto Brands and We'll Guess What Car You Drive

Zoe Samuel

Image: Tom Merton/OJO Images/GettyImages

About This Quiz

Companies from Unilever to the local takeout joint spend huge sums of money on branding. From crafting the perfect shingle to multi-million dollar television ads, branding is an applied use of psychology; an exercise in influencing intangible feelings. Branding is about a lot more than just liking or disliking a brand. Brands intend to build specific impressions of a company, much like how companies craft mission statements to make tangible their purpose and marketplace goals.

Brands aren't so much the products themselves, but ideas, like a mirage seen far off in the desert. Brands are the public face of a company, after it has carefully done its hair, put on its makeup, and gotten its Instagram lighting perfect. Whether we realize it or not, we believe in all sorts of nonsense cultivated by branding. Even though BMW, Audi, and Mercedes-Benz all make essentially the same product with the same features, one is seen as sporty, one as practical, and one as the height of luxury. Are these brand labels fair? Are they even accurate?

Accuracy doesn't matter when it comes to having an effective brand. This is fine. We will use this deliberately to question you, figure out how you've been influenced by auto branding, and from that, we will guess what car you own. Take the quiz and put our smarts to the test!

How does Acura strike you?

Does Volvo make you want to go Scandi?

Is Lexus the "luxus" that Toyota wants us to think it is?

Does Volkswagen speak to your people?

Does Toyota put you to sleep?

Do you like Audi enough to put a ring on it? How about four?

Does Tesla electrify you?

Would you hire a butler if he came from Bentley?

Would you trust a Suzuki not to kill you?

Is BMW your ultimate driving machine?

Do you feel the love for Subaru?

Is Bugatti a brand to which you aspire?

Are you a Saab snob?

Have you earned your Cadillac?

Could you roll in a Rolls Royce?

Would you see the USA in your Chevrolet?

Would you kick it in a Ram?

Would you get out of the way of Dodge?

Does Porsche make you want to call 911?

Does the oval brand make you want to Ford any river?

Would you ride an upscale Nissan to Infiniti and beyond?

Do you rate Mitsubishi as a Zero, or a hero?

Would you trust a Jeep to get you from point A to point B?

Does Kia's warranty make you worry or does it give you a does of confidence?

Is Alfa Romeo your alpha?

Are Fiats fab or faux?

Is Aston Martin your double O one?

Does Jaguar make you want to leap or lie down?

Does Land Rover make you want to disco, or does it make you want to walk?

Is Mini your mouse house, or is it just a small, expensive BMW?

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