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About This Quiz
Be honest with yourself, when you walk up to the parts desk, do the people behind the counter take you seriously? Do you give the image of a manly mechanic or the kind of guy who is going to have to make five more trips to the store to get the right part?
Not everyone has to be a reincarnation of Henry Ford or the Brawny man to know their way around an automobile. Some of the most exceptional automotive engineers sit behind desks in suits and never get dirty, while some of the most brilliant backyard mechanics don't even wear shirts.
There is an alternative, though: the guys who couldn't care less about things like what the torque specs are for a small-block Chevy or valve timing. Do you know where you fall?
We don't care where you fall, because it takes all types of guys to make the world an exciting place. Imagine going to a NASCAR race and everyone's cheering for Kyle Busch. How boring would that be? After taking this quiz, you might realize that you are a little too rough around the edges or polished at the nails.
Who knows, you might find yourself enrolling in courses at the community college. Whether it's in automotive technology or flower arranging is up to you.
Don't be afraid to share the results with your friends, see what they think! Is our quiz spot on, or are we out in the left-field?
Google the prices of block heaters
Jump it off with your John Deere tractor
Use your portable jump start box
Call in sick and contemplate quitting your job
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Attempt to flag down the next passing motorist and ask for a ride
Steal some fuel from the nearest farmhouse and hope it's still good
Call your roadside assistance and wait four hours for delivery
Admit defeat and come to terms with the fact this is where you live now
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Retrieve your tire kit, plug the tire and reinflate with your portable air machine
Jack vehicle up, remove the wheel, then walk to the nearest gas station for air
Grab the jack and throw on your properly inflated OEM donut of a spare tire
Proceed to drive on the rim, causing a shower of sparks and destroyed rubber
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Place a piece of electrical tape over the light, problem solved!
Whip your personal code reader out of the glove box and check
Get it scanned at a car part store and hope it's nothing expensive
Drive with the light on, it's not broken until it doesn't run, right?
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Spin your ballcap around to face backward and approach the other car while flexing your muscles
Approach the other car with balled fists, not really wanting to fight but you will if you need to
Get your car to a safe location and then stay in it and call the local authorities
Tend to the matter with a level head, taking pictures of everything like a paparazzi on Grammy night
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Dump a few quarts of oil in it until the noise abates
Order a new head gasket and roll up your sleeves
Get to the nearest oil change place and let them go at it
Turn up the radio and drive faster to mute the noise
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Try to accelerate to gain momentum and hopefully get to a place to pull off
Pull to the side of the road even though there is no shoulder and add stop-slip
Calmly try different gears to see if it's just the one that gave out on you
Continue at speed to see if the transmission will kick into a gear that works
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Bypass the heater core with a small piece of pipe and head south instead
Find a mechanic who doesn't mind loaning you a few tools and bay space
Swallow your mechanical pride and make it to the nearest town to get fixed
Buy a sleeping bag and cut out two arm and leg holes to wear while driving
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Attach a flashlight to the hood above the burnt-out light with duct tape
Keep on driving! You can see well enough to get to where you're going.
Place your flashers on to increase visibility to other drivers
Realize it's only a low-beam bulb issue and use your high beams instead
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Remove your own belt and rig it up to operate the few pulleys needed and arrive just in time for cake
Call a flatbed to tote both you and your car to the event, and make a grand entrance once you get there
You find it too difficult to repair on the side of the road and send for an Uber for a ride to the party
Decide you didn't like those people very much anyway and wait at the nearest tavern for a tow truck
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Pop the clutch and start it that way, only wusses drive automatics.
Tap the starter with a hammer, which does the trick
Promptly call the nearest tow company because your car is under warranty
Put your car on Craigslist with the description "Won't start, dunno why."
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Downshift to decelerate
Press even harder
Pump the brakes for pressure
Pop it in neutral and pull to the shoulder
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Remember a river a mile back and harvest some from there
You don't have water, but you have emergency antifreeze, ha!
Fish out all of the half-consumed water bottles from your floorboards
Use the melted ice from your beverage cooler
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Get hot water and toss it onto the window, then instantly regret it
Grab your ice scraper and use your muscles to physically remove the obstruction
Turn on the car heater but press the A/C button as well and crank up the fan
Decide that you're not in that much of a hurry and let the car warm up normally
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A peeling clear coat is definitely not appealing, get a respray right away!
Take steps to lessen the severity and invest in a few rattle cans of topcoat
Shrug it off and be proud of the fact the stupid thing still runs
Peel some off by hand, but then decide it's time for a new car anyway
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Place a series of long branches under the tire and drive out
Find an shovel and scoop your way out
Call a tow truck, wait for hours and never speak of it again
Flag down a vehicle at the nearest road and ask for a pull out
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Work, to use some vacation days
The local dealership service advisor
Your buddies to arrange a play date in the garage
Mom, to inform her you'll be late to dinner
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Select the smallest window and bust it out
Find a crook with a slim jim and pop it open
Fish around in the door jamb with a coat hanger
Use the spare key you have hidden in the gas lid
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Apply belt dressing, and LOTS of it
Replace the belt with a newer one
Adjust the pulleys to not be so tight
Accept the fact it makes noise
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Keep pumping the gas until it floods out, then try again later
Pull a plug and see if they're fouled or showing signs of wear
Pull the air filter and wiggle the throttle cable around a bit
Adjust the carburetor and shoot a bit of starting fluid at it
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Twist the knobs around a bit to see if it's just the volume
Check the Bluetooth connection through your phone
Check the wiring behind the unit for loose wires
Pull the radio fuse from the box to see if it has blown
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Have it towed home, then let it sit broken for months
Call your buddy to bring you a replacement part
Jack up the vehicle and prepare it for roadside assistance
Pull the plates and start walking, it's not worth fixing.
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Grab the nearest hunk of wire and create your own exhaust sling
Realize nothing is holding you back from a full performance exhaust upgrade
Order a replacement exhaust hanger and refrain from driving until it's fixed
Aim for potholes with the goal of having it ripped completely off
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The scissor jack from the trunk
A low-profile floor jack
A hydraulic bottle jack
An ancient bottle jack that doesn't work
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Roll down your window and drive with your head sticking out
Keep driving, but increase your following distance
Slow down and continue driving with your hazards on
Pull to the side of the road and enjoy nature's great show
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Grab a can of R-134 and recharge the system, hoping it works
Slap a bit more antifreeze in the radiator and cross your fingers
Turn the car on and off a few times, hoping that will do the trick
Roll down the windows and head to the beach for some relaxation
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Pull the plugs and replace all firing components and the airflow sensor for good measure
Whip out your handy-dandy compression test kit and anticipate having to pull the motor
Inspect the obvious first, starting with the air filter and working your way inward
Drain the fuel and replace it with a higher octane batch, hoping it was just bad gas
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Sell it to some poor sap and skip town ASAP
Chat with your attorney about legal recourse
Protest outside the dealership until a replacement
Have it towed out into a field and set it ablaze
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"Did I pay my insurance policy this month?"
"Uh oh, better get Maaco!"
"I better film this, it'll go viral!"
"What a buzzkill, man!"
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You Got:
