Tell Us About Your Personality and We'll Match You to Your Ideal Tattoo

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
3 min
Tell Us About Your Personality and We'll Match You to Your Ideal Tattoo
Image: Marco_Piunti/E+/Getty Images

About This Quiz

Tattoos aren't bell bottoms. Tattoos aren't a haircut. Getting a tattoo should not be a frivolous decision, no matter what your friends say after a night of drinking that ends at a local tattoo parlor. Tattoos are deeply personal value statements, even when they aren't meant to be.

If you get a tattoo that suggests a religious affiliation, it's reasonable to assume that not only are you a member of said faith, but that you take it very seriously. If you got a symbol related to a sports team, or a comic book, or a hate group, the meaning would similarly be taken. Even just getting some flash from the wall of a tattoo parlor says that you're a bit impulsive, and depending on how NSFW that tattoo is, it could say other things you may not want it to say.

Do not fret. We have some questions for you. Answer them, and we will be able to guide you to the ink appropriate to your personality. If you don't agree with our pick that's fine, but if you get canned for getting a Mike Tyson facial tattoo, don't blame us. Tell us a bit about your personality, and we'll tell you what design to have indelibly inked into your living flesh!

What is your guilty pleasure?
Old horror films
The Vampire Diaries
Reality shows
Top 40 music

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What habit drives you crazy?
Quoting Family Guy
Humming
Tapping
Sucking one's teeth

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How's your relationship with food?
Fine. Average, I guess.
I'm on the neolithic diet. Not the paleo diet. That's so 2018.
I have a real fear of it.
I've had some weight issues.

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How up to date is your style?
It's old.
It's bleeding edge.
I'm in the sweet spot for modern fashion.
I stick to the classics.

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How spiritual are you?
Not at all
I'm straight up religious, not spiritual.
I'm a very spiritual person.
I have my private beliefs, sure.

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How old are you?
21
30
26
38

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Do you like to think of yourself as provocative?
Oh yeah. I love to shock.
A bit, yeah.
No. Not at all.
I like to be original, not provocative.

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What is your favorite form of popular culture?
Internet videos
Movies
TV
Music

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Which of these is closest to your dream job?
Performance artist
Installation artist
Poet
Shaman

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How would you prefer to commute to work?
Drive in a sports car
Ride a motorcycle
Walk
Ride a bicycle

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How privileged are you?
I come from towering privilege.
Not at all
Quite a bit!
Not very

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What is your favorite style of cuisine?
American
Chinese
French
Italian

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Do you have any dietary restrictions?
I'm gluten-free. By choice.
I'm lactose intolerant.
I've decided that I'm allergic to anything that's not organic, free range, and fair trade.
No

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How are you with crowds?
I get a little anxious.
I feel comfortable and anonymous.
I feel vulnerable.
I feel the rush!

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What is your first stop when you go to a party?
The bar! Let's get wasted!
The food! I can't party on an empty stomach.
The dance floor!
The bathroom. Plan ahead.

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What item do you find yourself impulse buying?
Clothes
Gear
Shoes
Pens

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What do you sing in the shower?
Death metal
Classic rock
Kesha
Hip-hop

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What comfy clothing do you put on when you aren't going out?
Yoga pants
Sweats
Track suit
Stretchy jeans

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What makes the ideal pet?
A tarantula
A big dog, like a Lab or an Irish wolfhound
A small dog, like a Chihuahua, or a cat
A bird, like a parrot

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What gets you into a competitive mindset?
When someone tries to shock me
When someone shows their fortitude
When someone gets all the attention
When a line is drawn in the sand

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What is your favorite outdoor activity?
Exhibitionism
Racing
Goat yoga
Hiking

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What TV show do you watch?
American Horror Story
Travelers
Keeping Up With The Kardashians
I don't have one.

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How varied are your musical tastes?
I only like one style of music.
I like a couple genres of music.
I listen to anything if it is popular.
I listen to everything.

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What makes you shy?
Nothing
Bringing up my childhood
Compliments
Being put on the spot

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What makes you feel confined?
Expressions of powerful feelings toward me
Long contracts
9 to 5 jobs
Cities

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How do you measure your happiness?
In memories
In stories with friends
In stuff I've accumulated
In pets

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How scrappy is your social circle?
Fairly scrappy, but there are some wealthy folks too.
Very scrappy indeed
Not at all scrappy
Totally scrappy. I know no one who gets through life without a struggle.

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How educated are you?
I'm too educated.
I've got a high school diploma.
I did some undergraduate college.
I have a bachelor's degree.

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How committed to getting a tattoo are you?
Oh, I'm almost certainly getting one.
Come hell or high water
I'm pretty sure I'll get one.
I'm really not sure I'll get one at all.

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Do you promise to undertake the tattoo suggestion we propose?
Yes! Absolutely!
I'll take it under strong consideration.
No way!
Maybe

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You Got:

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