Two Truths and a Lie: “SpongeBob SquarePants” Edition

Though they've settled in nicely at Shady Shoals Retirement Home, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy aren't afraid to come out of retirement and speed to the scene of the crime in their invisible boat mobile. Unlike most humans, they don't need air helmets and can breathe and communicate perfectly well with the sea creatures of Bikini Bottom.

During one long 24-hour shift at the Krusty Krab, Squidward tells SpongeBob the story of the Hash Slinging Slasher. When this former fry cook with a spatula for a hand is ready to attack, the lights will flicker, an empty bus will pull up outside, and the phone will ring ... but there won't be anyone on the line.

When his friends make fun of him for being too close to his grandmother, SpongeBob dons a fake mustache to prove to his grandma that he is an adult. She is sad but begins to treat him like a grownup. Realizing that adulting is pretty tough, SpongeBob rips off his 'stache to take advantage of his wonderful granny, who bakes him cookies, gives him kisses and knits sweaters made with love in every stitch.

Well, the theme song tells us that SpongeBob lives in a pineapple under the sea, and his hours working as a fry cook at the Krusty Krab let our favorite sponge show off his spatula skills, but the driving thing ... nope. Despite attending boating school and trying for his license countless times, SpongeBob's terrible driving skills keep him off the road.

Owned by Mr. Krabs rival Plankton, the Chum Bucket sits across from the Krusty Krab to serve hungry diners. It's run only by Plankton and his wife and is home to a secret laboratory where Plankton carries our his evil experiments.

SpongeBob is a huge fan of The Jellyspotters and would do anything to impress them and their leader Kevin the sea cucumber at the Biannual Jellyfish Convention. Unfortunately, the group isn't very welcoming and tries their best to deter SpongeBob, even putting him in danger of being attacked by a Queen Jellyfish.

Given that it's always shown in Bikini Bottom, which sits under the sea, it's easy to deduce that the ship doesn't disappear when wet. The Flying Dutchman is run by ghost pirates, and if you steal the Captain's dining sock, he'll do almost anything to get it back.

SpongeBob spends a lot of time at Mrs. Puff's Boating School, where he is pretty much the bane of her existence. Not only is he a terrible driver, but he seems always to be causing her injury, or even destroying the entire school.

Patrick lives under a rock, has a pet rock, and some even say he has rocks for brains ... but this pink starfish is smarter than he looks. Often clad in his favorite green and purple pants, Patrick is a true friend to SpongeBob, and also happens to be surprisingly skilled behind the wheel of a boatmobile.

Larry the lobster is a buff lifeguard who works at Goo Lagoon and spends his spare time pumping iron. While most lobsters are blue when they're alive, Larry is bright red because he is a total tanning addict. While trying to compete with Larry's lifting skills, SpongeBob once over-exerted himself and split his pants.

Squidward lives in an Easter Island-inspired home with SpongeBob and Patrick as his closest neighbors. He spends his days working the cash register at the Krusty Krab, then comes home to play his clarinet, which he calls Clarry, until bedtime.

While we never get to see Pearl's mother on the show, it's clear that she can't be a crab, because Pearl is a sperm whale who looks nothing like her old man. The bubbly teen is on the cheer squad at school, sports a blonde ponytail, and is always trying to spend her frugal father's cash.

Every SpongeBob devotee eventually runs across the FUN song. While it may not make sense to landlubbers, "U" clearly stands for "you and me." Unless you're Plankton, then that "U" actually represents uranium bombs that can blow up the entire town in a single blast.

SpongeBob tackled parenting by pitting mom SpongeBob and dad Patrick as the parents to adopted scallop Junior. As expected, SpongeBob did all the work while Patrick mostly slept under his rock. The adoption ended with a major fight between the two, and Junior eventually flew away to forge an independent life.

Sheldon J. Plankton and his wife, a computer named Karen, own and operate the Chum Bucket. Cursed with a Napoleon complex because of his small stature, Plankton spends most of his time trying to steal a Krabby Patty so he can work out the secret formula used to make it.

Fans are introduced to Glove World in the episode where SpongeBob and Patrick travel on a bus to Rock Bottom to ride its star attraction, the Fiery Fist O'Pain. After losing their spines on the crazy coaster, the pair check out the park's mascot, Glovey Glove, and browse shops filled with glove action figures.

The episode where SpongeBob and Patrick sell chocolate is one of the most memorable in the entire series. While plenty of problems plague our favorite sea creatures, including being stalked by a screaming chocolate lover and multiple swindles from a clever salesman, the door-to-door adventure was not plagued by ghost pirates.

The site of a retirement home called Rusty Krab until Mr. Krabs came and added a K to the front of the sign, the Krusty Krab offers a full menu known as the Galley Grub. Squidward runs the cash register and takes orders for items like Kelp Rings and Coral Bits, while SpongeBob prepares the food with his trusty spatula. The bestselling product is, of course, the Krabby Patty.

Sandy is one of SpongeBob's few air-breathing friends. She lives in a Treedome, which is encased in a bubble to keep the water out, and wears an air-filled diving helmet when she ventures beyond her tree. A proud Texan, she is a brilliant scientist, a karate master, and one of the bravest and toughest critters under the sea.

Look, no one ever said Squidward had a great imagination. While it's clear that he is a lover of the arts, and quite the clarinet player, he is quick to point out to Patrick that neither mayonnaise nor horseradish is an instrument. This uber-popular moment takes place in the episode "Band Geeks," and Squidward tries to form a marching band to play at the Bubble Bowl.

Mr. Krabs can pinch a penny tighter than Scrooge himself but is willing to open his wallet at times to take Ms. Puff out on a date. He lives in an oversized anchor with his daughter Pearl and often bills his employees for the privilege of working for him.

Also eager to make a buck, Mr. Krabs offers Krusty Krab pizza for sale and tasks SpongeBob and Patrick with delivering it. SpongeBob tries to make the best of the outing by making up a song, the lyrics of which confidently proclaim Krusty Krab pizza as "the pizza for you and me!" And yes, delivery is free, so order today!

Sandy is one of the few air breathers living in Bikini Bottom. A strong and independent female squirrel, Sandy loves the state of Texas, the sport of karate and all things southern. Wake her up when she's hibernating, however, and she turns into a scary beast ready to punish any starfish or sponge who dares disturb her slumber.

Despite setting up their tent on the front lawn, SpongeBob and friends have quite the camping adventure. Roasting marshmallows and singing "The Campfire Song," which gets faster with every verse, the group enjoys a night out under the stars. The only negative is a sea bear attack, which naturally draws the attention of an angry sea rhino ... who goes straight for poor Squidward.

When SpongeBob calls the police on the TattleTale Stranger for littering, the criminal quickly escapes from custody and vows revenge. Donning a fake mustache, the fishy bad guy takes a job as SpongeBob's bodyguard. Eventually, he realizes he'd actually be safer in the slammer than hanging around an over-enthusiastic sponge, so he turns himself him.

SpongeBob is pretty much ready to break into song at any time, as evidenced by the many great tunes inspired by the show, many of which have found a place in pop culture. He can also soak up a surprising amount of fluid and has his own patented technique for blowing bubbles, which he will share with anyone for just a quarter.

DoodleBob comes to life when SpongeBob finds a magic pencil and draws a simple self-portrait in black and white. The resulting creature is eager to take Spongebob's place, so his creator tries to erase him. Unfortunately, he leaves behind a single arm, which attacks SpongeBob with a vengeance.

One of the most ferocious creatures to ever attack Bikini Bottom, the Alabama Bullworm is a giant pink worm with a surprisingly huge tongue. It leaves a path of destruction wherever it goes, and even Sandy can't defeat it until she and SpongeBob trick it into falling over a steep cliff.

Every good boss knows that it pays to recognize good employees. That's why the Krusty Krab picks an Employee of the Month every month. While SpongeBob almost always wins, he is still willing to do almost anything to claim the title once more, even though poor Squidward has never had the opportunity to win the honor.

For a show set underwater, SpongeBob mentions sweaters quite a bit. In one beloved song, SpongeBob declares that the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time, and on at least one occasion, he gifts Squidward a magnificent sweater made from his own eyelashes. While SpongeBob's grandmother makes sweaters with love in every stitch, not once has any of the characters recommended sporting a cardigan over a scuba suit.

From his castle in Atlantis, King Neptune rules the seas around Bikini Bottom and beyond. He lives with his wife, son Triton and daughter Mindy. SpongeBob once gets the chance to be his fry cook after pulling the golden spatula from the stone, and in the SpongeBob movie, Neptune almost kills Mr. Krabs for stealing his precious crown.

SpongeBob and Patrick love to head down to Jellyfish Fields and catch jellyfish with nets, always wearing their safety goggles to protect themselves from the creature's painful sting, which is especially painful when delivered by their queen. Devoted fans know that jellyfish jam is perfect on Krabby Patties, and that Squidward himself invented the sport when he traveled back in time.

Situated at the bottom of a 90-degree cliff, Rock Bottom is full of residents who speak with an unusual raspberry-blowing accent. While you can float home to Bikini Bottom on a balloon, you might not have much luck finding a bus, as bus service in Rock Bottom is surprisingly unpredictable.

SpongeBob and his BFF are distant relatives ... sort of. It turns out, Patrick Star is a cousin to SpongeBob's snail Gary. Gary is a loyal companion with a cat-like meow and has eyes that make a sound that jellyfish find soothing. While Gary will do a lot for SpongeBob, he isn't very competitive and will deteriorate rapidly if he's forced to race other snails, including Squidward's pet Snellie.

While attempting to impress Sandy on a trip to the beach, SpongeBob overexerts himself trying to lift weights, causing his pants to rip. Everyone laughs and SpongeBob decides that repeating the action will make him one of the cool kids. As he soon learns, repeated pants rips are boring and can even be annoying. He transforms his pain into a song about a fool who ripped his pants and lost his girl.