What % Dolly Parton Are You?

By: Emily Maggrett

What % Dolly Parton Are You?
Image: Sony Music Ent.

About This Quiz

Did you know that singer-songwriter Dolly Parton has received more awards than any other female country music star? It's true! Forget Taylor Swift; Dolly has had 26 #1 Billboard songs, 42 top-10 country albums and 110 singles. Thanks to this incredible career, Dolly Parton's name has become almost synonymous with country music. However, because of her roles in classic comedies like "9 to 5" and "Steel Magnolias," fans of every type of music have developed an appreciation for Parton's warm and winning personality.

But Dolly is more than a Southern blonde with a rhinestone-studded wardrobe. Because she grew up in Appalachia with very little money, Parton truly cares about giving back to others. In 1986, she opened her amusement park Dollywood, which brought many jobs to her home region by becoming the biggest attraction in Tennessee. The Backwoods Barbie also funds a major literacy program, the Imagination Library.

If you're a big Dolly fan, this is the quiz for you. We're going to ask you about how much make-up you wear, whether cowboy boots are cool, if you dig the taste of moonshine and whether you can play the guitar. By the end of the quiz, we'll have come up with a rating that will tell you exactly how much of a Nashville Queen you are! So, unless your name is Jolene, please come play this quiz!




Do people ignore your many talents because they think you're just a dumb blonde?
Sure, every once in a while.
No, because I'm not a dumb blonde.
Yes. People don't usually realize I'm smart until it's too late!
Perhaps at first, but I usually end up impressing them.

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What's your go-to karaoke song?
"Sweet Caroline"
"Wonderwall"
"Islands in the Stream"
"Help Me Make It Through the Night"

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Have you ever dreamed of living in one of these cities? Which one?
Los Angeles
New York City
Nashville
Austin

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Are you sassy, classy or brassy?
I'm more brassy than a tenor sax!
I'm as classy as a black tie affair.
I'm so sassy, I make Cardi B look like Emma Watson.
I'm all three!

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Which of these Hollywood stars would you most like to get lunch with?
Julia Roberts
Robert Pattinson
Lily Tomlin
Jane Fonda

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What would you call a small stream?
A brook
A rivulet
A crick
A creek

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On a typical day, how are you dressed?
In a blazer, white blouse, jeans and cowboy boots
All in black, with black leather loafers
In a denim jumpsuit with hundreds of rhinestones
In a ruffled pink dress, hoop earrings and heels

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Do you come from a large family?
I have a brother or sister.
I'm an only child.
My family is huge!
I've got three siblings.

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Who's your favorite Muppet?
Elmo
Kermit
Miss Piggy
Janis

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How do you feel about plastic surgery?
“If I see something sagging, bagging, or dragging, I'll get it nipped, tucked, or sucked.”
"I really understand the chagrin that accompanies aging, especially for a woman, but I think people look funny when they freeze their faces."
"I'm no natural beauty. If I'm gonna have any looks at all, I'm gonna have to create them.”
“I'm comfortable in my own skin, no matter how far it's stretched. Ha-ha.“

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Have you ever worked a 9 to 5 office job? Did you hate it?
"Workin' 9 to 5, what a way to make a living."
"Barely gettin' by, it's all takin' and no giving."
"They just use your mind and they never give you credit."
"It's enough to drive you crazy if you let it!"

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Who's your worst enemy?
Anybody who likes my potential new boyfriend
Jessica in HR
This lady Jolene
A traveling man I dated

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When you're relaxing alone at home, what kind of music do you listen to?
Bruno Mars, Ariana Grande or Miley Cyrus
John Coltrane, Explosions in the Sky or John Cage
Willie Nelson, Hank Williams or Loretta Lynn
Jason Aldean, Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood

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Are you a good negotiator? For instance, do you remember to ask for a raise every six months?
I ask for raises once a year.
I'm kind of shy about asking for more money.
I know my value and I'm not afraid to fight for it.
You should ask for a raise every six months, as well as whenever you're given new responsibilities.

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Would you ever wear a wig in public? What kind?
If my hair ever gets thin, I'm not opposed to wearing a wig.
A wig? On me? I don't think so!
Wigs give me life!
Everybody can benefit from using subtle wigs and hairpieces.

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Let's talk politics. Are you conservative, progressive or controversial?
I'm not very political.
I'm a Democrat.
I keep my politics secret, but am still considered controversial by conservatives I know.
I'm a Republican.

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Would you rather live on a mountain, by the sea or on a plain?
I prefer the lowlands.
I adore the beach.
I love the mountains.
I just want to live somewhere flat (it's easier to bike that way).

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how embarrassed would you be if someone asked you to star in your high school's spring musical?
6. I don't know if I could carry a play all by myself.
9. That sounds really mortifying.
0. I'd love to star in a musical!
3. I'd be nervous, but what an opportunity!

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Which of these quotes do you relate to the most?
"You'll never do a whole lot unless you're brave enough to try."
"I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb ... and I also know that I'm not blonde."
"Find out who you are and do it on purpose."
"The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain."

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If you were a flower made of metal, what kind would you be?
Copper Rose
Silver Camellia
Steel Magnolia
Iron Jasmine

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How tight do you wear your jeans?
They look like they're painted on.
I prefer wide-legged jeans.
I rarely wear skinny jeans.
They're so tight, I can't sit down.

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If you were at a Tennessee restaurant, which Southern dish would you be most likely to order?
Cornbread and honey
Jambalaya
Chicken and dumplings
Banana pudding

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Have you ever dated a guy with a truck?
Of course!
Ew, no.
I only date guys with trucks.
No, but only because I live in a city.

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Can we get you a refreshing drink? What'll you have?
Lemonade
La Croix
Sweet tea
Diet Coke

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If you had the money to fund any charitable cause, what kind would you give to?
Support centers for homeless LGBTQ youth
Water for Flint, Michigan
Literacy
Relief for the victims of wildfires

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Do you joke a lot about being wild, even though you've had the same partner for a really long time?
Look, those stories are hilarious.
No. I'm proud of being boring.
Even though my marriage is totally stable, I love talking like Samantha from "Sex and the City."
Maybe I talk too much about my single days sometimes.

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How much makeup is too much makeup?
Tinted moisturizer and mascara are enough for me!
All I need is lip balm and sunscreen.
I would rather die than leave the house without makeup on.
I like a full face of makeup: lipstick, eye shadow, foundation, the works!

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What's the most country thing you've ever done?
Had a summer fling with a rodeo star
Rented an Airbnb two hours outside a major city
Went swimmin' in a swimmin' hole
Hunted with a coon hound

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Do you know what "bless your heart" means?
It means that someone is kindly blessing your heart, i.e. wishing you well.
I'm not sure ... but it sounds weirdly aggressive.
It means that someone has a huge amount of contempt for you.
Them's fightin' words!

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If you wrote a song about love, what would you call it?
"I Will Sometimes Love You"
"I Will Rarely Love You"
"I Will Always Love You"
"I Will Often Love You"

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