What % Evil Is Your Cat?

By: Ian Fortey

5 Min Quiz

Image: gagilas photo/Moment/Getty Images

About This Quiz

Someone once said that dogs have owners while cats have staff, and that's a pretty decent glimpse of the overall attitude of cats around the world. Whether you have the friendliest kitty to ever frolic in a field or the surliest beast to ever hiss at a passing shadow, cats are very much known for having big, bold personalities. They need them to make up for their tiny bodies.

Inside every little cat beats the heart of a lion; they're just not sure how to express all those big feelings sometimes. And that means your precious little kitty might have to act out every now and then in ways that are less friendly and cuddly and more like what some might describe as straight-up evil.

Listen, we're not saying your cat is bad by any means. We're just saying maybe it's possible that your cat is a little more sinister than it needs to be. Maybe there's a hint of evil behind those whiskers. Maybe those purrs aren't happy rumbles but dastardly warnings of fearsome claws yet to come. But don't feel bad, it's not just your cat, it's all cats. Why not tell us a bit about your kitty and how they behave so we can determine just how evil that cat really is, though. Take the quiz and see!

Do you ever wake up and see your cat just staring at you?

All the time

Not usually
Once in a while

A few times, I guess.

Have you ever turned on the light in a room only to be met with your cat fleeing the scene as soon as you do?

Oh, yeah.

I can't recall that happening.
That does happen sometimes.

It's happened a few times.

How often does your cat come begging for food when you're eating dinner?

It happens a lot.

My cat doesn't beg.
If I didn't feed the cat first, he'll beg.

Depends on what I'm eating.

Cats sleep for most of the day. Where does your cat like to curl up for a nap?

Anywhere and everywhere

My cat has a bed.
On my bed

There are a few spots around the house.

Has your cat ever brought you a dead mouse as a gift?

Not sure it was a gift, but yes.

Never
I've had a couple turn up.

Once

Aside from mice, has your cat ever hunted any other wildlife?

My cat is after anything that moves.

Mostly just cat toys
My cat likes bird watching.

My cat hunts flies.

What does your cat think of dogs?

My cat is not a fan of dogs at all.

My cat has never met a dog.
My cat usually gets along with dogs.

My cat is indifferent to dogs.

If someone were to try to give your cat a belly rub, how would that work out for them?

They're going to end up bleeding.

My cat would love it.
I wouldn't recommend it.

My cat won't care.

When was the last time you heard your cat growl at something?

Within the last day

I don't know if I've ever heard my cat growl.
Probably sometime in the last couple of months.

I'm not sure. It doesn't happen a lot.

How does your cat respond when a stranger comes into the house?

My cat hides.

My cat loves people!
My cat will probably keep its distance.

My cat will make sure it's cool then come say hello.

If your cat is sleeping next to you in bed and holding the covers down, what will you do?

I'm letting it keep the covers.

I'll pull the covers up and snuggle with my cat.
I'll try to nudge it aside.

I'm taking my covers back.

Have you ever looked up from eating food and seen your cat across the room staring you down?

That happens a lot.

I don't think so.
Yeah, it's creepy.

Once in a while

Does your cat ever come to sit on you but then seem annoyed when you touch it?

Yes, all the time

My cat likes attention.
My cat will get annoyed after a while.

If he's in a mood, sure.

Have you ever gone from one room your cat was into another room only to discover your cat is already in there somehow?

Yes! My cat teleports!

What? No.
I thought this only happened to me.

Well, obviously my cat just ran ahead without me noticing. It's no big deal.

Does you cat ever groom itself on your lap?

Ugh. Yes.

No
Sometimes

I don't let that happen.

How well litter trained is your cat?

If the litter isn't perfect, my cat may pee on my stuff.

Very well trained
My cat makes a mess of the litter area but is mostly good.

No problems so far

Does your cat ever wipe its face on your face?

Yes, and it leaves spit trails.

I love that!
Sometimes. Is he marking me?

Yes. It's kind of cute.

How long after cleaning the litter box will your cat wait before using it?

He's used it while I was in the middle of cleaning it.

I honestly don't know.
As soon as I'm done, my cat goes in there.

I don't usually wait around to see.

Do you ever catch your cat staring at the ceiling even though there's nothing you can see up there?

Yes, what is that about?

Can't say that I have.
Once in a while

Sometimes, but it must be a fly or something.

Have you ever watched your cat trying to bite its own tail?

More times than I care to mention.

Not that often
Once in a while

Only when it was a kitten

Have you ever been minding your business in a very calm way only to have your cat attack your foot for no reason?

I have the scratches to prove it.

Never
Every once in a while, yeah

My cat's not big on feet.

Does your cat like to follow you around the house when you're up and doing things?

No, my cat has his own plans.

All the time
Once in a while

My cat will follow me to a new room but not really to be with me.

Does your cat ever go outside?

No, my cat is an indoor cat.

My cat likes to play in the yard sometimes.
My cat is usually indoors but likes being out in nice weather.

Very rarely

If your cat is on your lap, does it ever start kneading you to get comfy?

Complete with sharp claws and puncture wounds.

I love that. He's very gentle.
Yes, but it gets a little painful sometimes.

Not very often, but I like it when he does.

If your cat wants to be fed, how does it let you know that it's dinner time?

My cat makes a ton of noise.

We have a scheduled feeding time.
I'll probably hear some meowing.

My cat hangs out near the food bowl.

When you've been out of the house for a long time, how does your cat greet you when you come home?

My cat doesn't do greetings.

My cat will run to me and start purring and rubbing against me.
Usually, my cat will just look at me.

My cat will come to say hello and get petted.

Have you ever gone out of your way to get a special treat for your cat only to have your cat ignore it?

More than you know

No, my cat loves treats.
Yeah, that's weird, right?

Not that often

Has your cat ever stolen food from you?

All the time. Aggressively.

Of course not
More than I'd like.

A couple of times, yes.

How often does your cat decide it needs to get comfortable in the most inconvenient place imaginable?

All the time

Not that often
It does like to block the TV.

My cat will sit on me just when I want to get up sometimes.

What is your cat up to right this second?

My cat is staring at me.

Being cute
Sleeping

I'm not sure.

5 Minute Quiz 5 Min

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