What Predator Represents You in Bed?

By: Ian Fortey
Estimated Completion Time
5 min
What Predator Represents You in Bed?
Image: Pixabay by ArtTower

About This Quiz

Is it any surprise that we use so many animal metaphors to describe people in life? Someone's a cold fish, a scapegoat or a sacrificial lamb.  We're part of the rat race full of busy beavers looking for their cash cow. Some of us start as ugly ducklings and grow up to be dark horses. It's a veritable zoo out there. And all of that's just in public! In private, things get a little more beastly.

Since animals have so many qualities we find admirable, it makes sense we'd want to compare ourselves. To be as strong as a lion, as fearsome as a bear, or as wise as an owl all sound like good things. And maybe when it comes to sex, we can compare ourselves with a lot of the same qualities. Who doesn't want to be virile and agile and packed with stamina?

Now, maybe you're not sure what animal represents you in bed. Perhaps you never even thought about it before. But if you answer a few questions for us, we'll not only tell you what animal you are in bed; we'll also tell you what predator you are. Top of the food chain, real deal creatures here. No bunnies on this list! Take the quiz and see!

When you meet someone you're interested in, what's your seduction technique?
Get in there quickly
Direct and to the point
Play it cool
Keep them laughing
Say you're out with friends and some stranger sends you a drink. How do you respond?
Head right over to them
Drink it
Keep an eye on them for now
Make a joke about it
What's one thing someone can do to stand out from the crowd and grab your attention right away?
Dance
Come directly up to me and say what they're thinking
Be confident but not arrogant
Make me laugh

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What would be your ideal weekend getaway for you and someone else?
Anything where we can hike or do something physical
A cabin in the woods
The beach
A weekend in with movies and fun
Do you consider yourself adventurous in the bedroom?
I'm willing to try something new.
I can be a bit stubborn, but maybe.
I'll consider new things, but I might need time.
You should always be open to fun in the bedroom.
If your partner suggested a threesome, how would you respond to that?
Again?
That could cause some anger.
I'd want to know who they were thinking of.
That could be fun.

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Would you ever consider bringing in toys or props in the bedroom?
It's happened before.
I don't know how necessary that is.
If they're worth using, sure.
I love that stuff!
Have you ever considered any kind of roleplay in the bedroom?
I've done it before.
Not sure that's my thing.
If it was something we both liked, sure.
I usually crack up during that kind of thing.
What kind of roleplay scenario do you think sounds like the most fun?
Athlete/Cheerleader
Boss/Secretary
Cop/Prisoner
Pizza Delivery Person

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Have you ever partaken in a little dirty talk in the bedroom?
I have a bit of a dirty mouth.
I'm more of a grunter than a talker.
I'm willing to say the odd nasty thing if motivated.
I love it. I laugh sometimes, but I still love it.
Would you ever have sex in public where there's a risk of being caught?
Why not? We can always run for cover.
I don't want anyone seeing that.
I prefer to sneak under the radar if I'm being honest.
That would make for a fun story.
Have you ever send a nude photo of yourself to someone else?
I've snapped a few choice images.
That's not really my thing.
You couldn't see my face, but yes.
I've been goofing around and sent a few pics to someone.

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Has anyone ever sent you dirty pictures you never asked for?
Ugh.
Yep. Deleted.
I've never experienced that. Not yet, anyway.
I showed them to some friends. We had a good laugh.
Have you ever read any hints or tips on making your sex life better?
I've read some websites.
I've seen some things in magazines.
I bought a book.
Like, serious ones? Not really.
Has food ever become a part of your sexual activity?
Everyone likes chocolate, don't they?
I tried it out before.
Not really for me.
Fruit, liquids, Pop Rocks, I'll try whatever.

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What's the best place in the house to engage in some sexy fun?
There are a couple of rooms that seem to work best.
Bedroom. Shower. Sofa. It varies.
I mean, the bed is the most convenient place.
Wherever we are when the mood strikes.
Say you walk into a room and discover your partner is watching some porn. What do you do?
Join in!
Ask why I wasn't invited.
Spy
Should I make popcorn?
What's your opinion on joining the Mile High club?
Again?
How does anyone do anything in a bathroom that small?
I'm not 100% sure that's my thing.
I would love to try that.

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How many one-night stands would you say you've had in your life?
More than a few, I guess.
One or five or whatever
I didn't count.
Not a ton. Like maybe a lot, but not a ton.
Would you ever have sex with someone if you didn't know their name?
I have.
I feel like I should know their name first.
I don't need to know their name for that, really.
I'd probably prefer to know their name, but OK.
Would you ever have sex in the bathroom of a bar or a club?
Yep
Gross
I'd prefer elsewhere.
This is pretty low on my list, but maybe.

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How do you tend to keep your bedroom?
Mostly tidy
It's a disaster zone.
Immaculate
It's, you know, cleanish.
Do you own any sex toys?
I have a drawer no one is allowed to look at.
Maybe
I have a couple of things.
I have a collection.
When sexy time is over, what do you do next?
Go home, I guess.
I need a snack. Or at least a drink.
Shower
Probably cuddle, chat, whatever

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How many sexual partners have you had in your life?
Not enough
I've been around the block a couple of times.
Enough
More than a few
Have you ever cheated on someone?
I have.
No
Maybe
Nah, that's not me.
How would you react if you found out your partner was having an affair?
Be offended that I wasn't included.
It looks like I don't have a partner anymore.
Learn as much as I can about who and why and then decide what to do.
Well, that sucks.

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Are you a vocal person during sex? Noises, talking, anything?
I've been known to get a little loud.
I sound like an angry zoo.
I keep it fairly subtle.
Talking, laughing, screaming, I do it all.
Most sexy times start with some kissing. Are you a fan?
Some passionate kissing can be sexy.
Kissing is very important.
It's a good way to build up to the big show.
Hell yes, gimme that tongue.
When did you last have sex with someone?
Within the last day
This week
It's been a little while.
What time is it right now?

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