What % Tony Soprano Are You?

By: Raj Chander

What % Tony Soprano Are You?
Image: Youtube by Kenneth Gainz

About This Quiz

Mafia culture has lots of well-known personalities. Michael Corleone balanced a cold, ruthless loyalty to the family with his desire to get out of the business. The Irish-Italian Henry Hill went from dreaming of life as a "made man" to living out his last days in witness protection. 

But there has never been a mobster quite like Tony Soprano.

In the late 90s and early 2000s, "The Sopranos" dominated cable TV airwaves, drawing in millions of viewers every Sunday. To this day, it remains one of HBO's most successful programs. Much of this success stemmed from the show's deplorable yet lovable anti-hero, mob boss Anthony Soprano. 

We watched a brutal enforcer executing his victims as they begged for their lives, yet form a nurturing bond with animals like ducks and horses. We saw him declare his love for his wife and family, then sleep with the next pretty face that came into his life. As hypocritical and brutal as his behavior may have been, at the end of the day, you couldn't help but root for him to work out the issues in his two families: His "waste management" associates and his wife and kids at home. The fun part was seeing which one was more dysfunctional from week to week.

While his temper and violent nature made him plenty of enemies, his protective, nurturing side was appreciated by his loved ones. Ever thought about how alike you and Tony Soprano are? If you've ever wondered if you could be a mob boss -- or even just the boss of your family -- these questions will provide answers!

How do you feel about animals?
I love them! I feel a strong connection and need to protect almost all types of animals.
They're fine, I guess. I don't really think too much about them.
I enjoy being around certain types of animals, but I wouldn't go out of my way for them.
I really like certain kinds of animals, but not all of them.

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What’s your take on children?
I don't have kids and don't really see kids in my future.
My partner wanted/wants kids more than me. I enjoy them, but they aren't a core part of my identity.
I like being a mother/father or like the idea of being one eventually, but my life has other important pursuits in it.
I am all about family, especially kids. They need to be cared for and brought up the right way.

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How close are your professional associates to you?
I consider my colleagues friends, and we spend time together outside work, but I still have boundaries with them.
We speak at the office, but I don't really know them beyond that.
My coworkers are like family to me, or they are literally my family.
We are casual friends - every once in a while I'll hang out with a group outside work, but not regularly.

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What do you think of psychotherapy?
It's totally normal - I've never been, but there's no reason to be ashamed or embarrassed of it.
It's completely embarrassing that I have to do it, but I think it actually helps.
It's OK - maybe it could help some people, but I don't think it's right for me.
It might be able to help some people, maybe even me, but I'm worried my friends might judge me.

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What is your ideal spouse like?
Loyal, attractive, a great parent, and capable of handling a lot of the crap I give her
I mostly go for looks, but it's nice to be able to hold a conversation with someone.
I think I would be OK with any kind of husband or wife, as long as we love each other.
I would like to be with someone with the same views, heritage, and religion as me, personality matters more.

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How important is monogamy in a relationship?
Ehhh...you only live once, and there's a lot of beautiful guys/girls out there.
It's critical. I can't imagine being in a relationship where my partner and I weren't 100% loyal to each other.
It matters - my eye wanders sometimes, but I don't think I'd ever actually cheat on my partner.
I don't know, I would probably consider being in an open relationship if it was important to my partner.

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How short is your temper?
If people would stop pissing me the hell off, they wouldn't have to worry about it so much.
I can count on one hand the number of times I've lost my cool - people know me for my even demeanor.
I sometimes get really upset, but there are only a few topics that set me off.
I'm mostly in control, but every once in a blue moon I snap. I always regret it after.

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What kind of work are you best at?
I like to manage people, and I'm best in a position with lots of variety.
I'm fine with a normal job, but I don't mind getting my hands dirty once in a while and prefer to be in a position of leadership.
A normal desk job with most of my time spent on a computer is perfect.
I thrive in entrepreneurial positions where I run the show and every day is different.

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How would your colleagues describe you?
A tough boss. Failure is not an option - subordinates are pushed to perform their best.
A little tough sometimes, but overall a team player who is easy to work with.
Kind of abrupt, but does good work and has a positive attitude. Above all values success.
A sweetheart who accommodates almost any request and puts the team before himself/herself.

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Which of these mental disorders is most likely to affect you?
Impostor Syndrome
Severe Anxiety
Panic Attacks
Depression

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What’s your ideal dinner?
Pasta al dente with plenty of gravy, bread and salad, washed down with a glass of red wine.
Pizza
A nice hearty lasagna with lots of meat and cheese
Something light and healthy like a salad or vegetable stir-fry

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Which of these places is best for relaxation?
A nice restaurant
A strip club, ideally surrounded by some of my best friends
A trail or court where I can do something active
A fun bar or club

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Which is your ideal type of car?
An American sports car
An exotic Italian supercar
Something practical and not too expensive
A big, powerful SUV that demands respect on the road

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What do you think about recreational drugs?
I'm not excessively for or against them.
I'm fine with it, as long as you can handle your business.
Totally against them - you should get high naturally.
It's OK for some people, but I would never try them myself.

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How would you describe your father during your childhood?
Overall a loving, caring person who had his flaws.
He was tough and sometimes even brutal, but I learned a lot from him and I always respected him as a person and professional.
A bit rough around the edges - his relationship with mom was sometimes strained, but he always loved us.
A model father who was always faithful and loving to my mother and patient and kind to me.

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How important is family?
Family is everything to me, plain and simple.
It matters, but I have an identity outside my family too.
Family is one of the top few most important things in my life.
I don't feel a particularly close connection to my family.

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How important is honor/code?
You should live honorably, but it's not important to have a specific set of morals.
I live every part of my life by a code that I swore to uphold, and that will never change.
Honor and code is very important. Your moral code should almost never change, except in extreme circumstances.
It's not that big of a deal.

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What is your attitude about addiction?
Addiction is a disease and addicts are victims who should be treated, not punished.
It's not the most serious condition in the world, but addicts deserve care and treatment.
I guess it can be a real problem for some people, but I don't think it could ever happen to me.
Addicts are mentally weak people who need to toughen up.

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What does sex mean to you?
I'm usually a relationship-sex type of person, but I've had a few one-night stands in my life.
It's an intimate form of emotional connection that should be reserved for a spouse or long-term partner.
It's just a way to get some pleasure - I don't have to feel a strong connection to someone for sex.
It's a human thing that everyone should do - it's better in a relationship, but doesn't have to be.

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What’s the most attractive thing about the opposite sex?
Physical attractiveness
A good personality
An equal blend of looks and personality
I'm attracted to looks first, but personality matters.

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What’s your attitude about homosexuality?
I guess it's OK, but it's hard for me not to be uncomfortable around gay people.
It's unnatural and I would not accept it if one of my children was gay.
It's completely normal - some people are just born that way, but they are still regular people.
It was a little weird for me at first, but I'm mostly fine with it.

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How do you handle your loved ones’ failures?
It's privately a little disappointing, but I try not to let it impact the way I view them.
I embrace them lovingly and reassure them that it will be OK.
It's unacceptable and I make sure they know it.
I don't like it at all, and I will try to help them correct it so they can do better next time.

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How important is masculinity?
Masculinity is a social construct that in many cases does more harm than good.
Men need to act like men.
It's OK for guys to be emotional in a small handful of times, but outside that they should be strong and tough.
It's not a big deal either way.

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How proud are you of your ethnic heritage?
I guess it's nice to be who I am, but I don't think about it much.
I don't really care - I didn't have a choice in it anyway.
Proud, but it's just one part of my identity.
Extremely proud - it's a big part of who I am.

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How is your relationship with your mother?
Not the best - we were never really close, and I don't think she did the best job raising me.
She wasn't perfect, but overall she did a good job and we have a pretty solid relationship.
There aren't enough curse words in the English language to describe her.
Me and my mom are best friends, and I love her more than almost anyone.

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How is your relationship with your uncle?
He can be a real jerk and is hard on me, but I love him and appreciate his role in my life - for the most part.
He has many flaws, but he's still family.
It's a perfect relationship - he loves me and would never think badly of me.
We have our hiccups here and there, but we get along well for the most part.

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What do you think about college education?
I graduated with a 4-year degree, but I don't think every kid should go to college.
It wasn't for me, but I think it's important for my kids to go to college.
I didn't finish college, but I think most kids should go, unless they have a specific alternate plan.
I have a graduate degree (or higher) and believe most people should go to college.

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How do you move up professionally?
Keep my head down and work hard without calling attention to myself.
Relationships are important, but ultimately it comes down to the quality of my work.
It's more about who I know than what I do.
Be aggressive and take the position I want by making a big splash.

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Who would you prefer your child to date?
Anyone they want, as long as they are the right match for them.
It would be great for them to date someone of the same race, but it's not a requirement.
They have to date someone from the same race and religion, with the same values as my family.
It would be best for them to date someone like them, but I might be able to come around if they didn't.

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How do you teach your kids?
Discipline and punishment for wrongdoing
Through love and affection
An equal mix of carrot and stick tactics
Mostly through kindness, but kids do need to be punished every once in a while

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