What Would Your Job Be in the FBI?

By: Ryan Choate
Estimated Completion Time
5 min
What Would Your Job Be in the FBI?
Image: D-Keine/E+/Getty Images

About This Quiz

The FBI as we know it today has roots that go back to the early 20th century during the Roosevelt administration. At the time, Attorney General Charles Bonaparte was trying to assemble a cadre of lawmen to combat various rising crimes. At the blessing of the president in 1908, Bonaparte amassed a group of investigators to work for the Department of Justice. This is typically referred to as the birth of the FBI, or the Federal Bureau of Investigation, though at the time the bureau was just known as the BOI (Bureau of Investigation).

The FBI has a vast number of different jobs under the Department of Justice for the sole purpose of protecting our nation and citizens from terrorism, cyber criminals, mobsters, corrupt government officials and serial killers. Jobs within the FBI include field agents, who are the boots-on-the-ground investigators, to cybercrime analysts, who investigate all forms of nefarious online activity. Do you have a knack for analyzing data, navigating the dark web or finding pieces of a puzzle that nobody else can see? If you think you are the next Donnie Brasco, come examine this quiz and we will guess what you job would be in the FBI!

Do you like to sit undisturbed for long periods of time?
I can stare off into space for hours.
Only when I exercise
I need to constantly move around.
Yep, I'm like a sloth.

Advertisement

How much time do you spend per day on the internet?
More than 8 hours
Less than an hour to check the news
4-5 hours; have to update my social-media profiles
I prefer being out in nature.

Advertisement

Do you like to people watch in public places?
Nah, I don't care what people are doing.
Yes, I find people funny.
Only if someone is doing something crazy
I only go out so I can see what other people are doing.

Advertisement

What is your favorite TV show featuring characters who are in the FBI?
"Numbers"
"Criminal Minds"
"The X-Files"
"Bones"

Advertisement

If the FBI does a background check on you, will you pass?
How far back do they check?
Clean as a whistle
I've been know to jaywalk.
I should probably look for a different job.

Advertisement

FBI agents go through extensive training. Which of the following would be too difficult for you?
Weeks of academic classroom study
Running an obstacle course called "hot pursuit"
Gun-range training
Mock interviews

Advertisement

Are you willing to relocate anywhere in the U.S. for a job with the FBI?
No, this is where I live.
Yeah, I don't care, just give me a job.
I prefer the West Coast.
Only if it's a city

Advertisement

Describe your skill at the board game Clue.
Excellent record of successfully exposing the murderer
Professor who?
The Colonel is so smug
I always get stuck in the library.

Advertisement

What is your comfort level with technology?
I have a smartphone.
I gave it all up after that Y2K scare.
I run a multi-terminal JESD 3270 mainframe.
DOS is just fine for me, thanks.

Advertisement

How would you describe your communication skills?
I'm between a wallflower and a mouse.
I will talk to anybody.
I need a few drinks to loosen up.
Mr. One-Word Answer

Advertisement

How good are you at handling a gun?
I shot a beer can once.
I'm a dead eye.
I'd rather have an office job.
Never have, but they train you, right?

Advertisement

What would a "hot pursuit" look like to you?
Oh yeah, that movie with Reese Witherspoon.
High-speed car chase through crowded city streets
Foot chase
Breaking down a door looking for perps

Advertisement

Which term best describes a computer program that alters the function of another computer program?
Virus
Worm
Salamander
Spam

Advertisement

When you hear the term "hacker," what do you think of?
A computer criminal
Someone with a bad cough
Cyberpunk
Taxi driver

Advertisement

Have you ever seen a UFO?
No, but I was a big fan of "The X-Files."
It was either a UFO or a shooting star.
Yes, so many green and red lights
There are no little green men out there.

Advertisement

Where did you grow up?
Suburbs
City dweller
Small town
Midwest

Advertisement

When was the last time you ran further than a mile at one time?
Junior high
Last summer
6:00 am this morning
A mile? You're crazy

Advertisement

Are you good at doing crossword puzzles?
I do the L.A. Times and the New York Times daily.
I prefer sodoku.
I hate those dang things.
I start one but never finish it.

Advertisement

Which of the following do you consider a sport?
"Fortnite"
Bowling
Golf
Shuffleboard

Advertisement

Which of the following best describes you in high school?
Band geek
Computer-club treasurer
Prom queen
Three-sport athlete

Advertisement

When you have a disagreement with someone, what do you do?
Spread lies about them online
Take an empathetic approach
I will argue all day.
Take their side to end the debate

Advertisement

How do you feel about abstract art?
It's deep, man.
My three-year-old could paint that.
I don't really get it.
I appreciate anyone who is creative.

Advertisement

Describe you leadership style.
I will email you all the directives.
Lead by setting a positive example
People don't really listen to me when I talk.
Take notes on this three-hour PowerPoint

Advertisement

How do you know if someone is lying to you?
I saw it on their Facebook page.
I believe in the good of everyone.
It's so obvious when they sweat that much.
I can see all their tells.

Advertisement

How do you stay current with the news?
BuzzFeed on my smartphone
CNN online
The New York Times; I like reading a paper.
Who cares? It doesn't effect me anyway.

Advertisement

You might have to put yourself if harm's way for you country. Are you willing to do so?
By harm, do you mean carpal tunnel syndrome?
Sign me up!
I will take a bullet for the red, white and blue.
I prefer an office job.

Advertisement

How do you feel about serial killers?
My Netflix playlist is full of serial-killer documentaries.
Horrific, disgusting human beings
Can't believe their parents raised them that way
I would love to know what is going on in their heads.

Advertisement

If you show up to a crime scene of a murder, what is the first thing you do?
Go puke
Check to see if the body is cold
Look around for evidence
I faint at the sight of blood.

Advertisement

You recognize a wanted fugitive at the grocery store. What do you do?
Snap a photo on my phone to post on Snapchat
Call 911
Make a citizen's arrest
Hide behind the melon bins until they leave

Advertisement

When you stub your toe on the coffee table, do you yell at the coffee table?
Nah, I just suck it up.
Yes. It's always the table's fault.
Somebody moved that table.
I go in the bathroom and cry.

Advertisement

You Got: