Which Biblical Man Are You?
By: Geoff Hoppe
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Image: Kemter / E+ / Getty Images
About This Quiz
So you know the Bible like the back of your hand. You know the stories, the people, and the history of salvation backward and forward. But that doesn't mean you yet know which man from the Bible you'd be ... until now! In this quiz, test yourself to see which famous Biblical man matches you the most closely. You might be Old Testament, you might be New Testament -- but whatever you might be, this quiz will be a testament to how you match up to the Bible's most famous people!
The Bible's an inspiration for billions of people worldwide. It's a part of our culture, our civilization and even how we think reflexively about a lot of issues. And, on a more personal level, the way you think reflexively about certain issues may match up with some of the most important characters from the Bible. Is your leadership style like the important men in the history of salvation? How about your personality? How about even your taste in music? If you can't wait to figure out which "spirit animal" is your Biblical man, jump into this quiz and start answering questions! You might be surprised at what you find, and who you turn out to have the most in common with!
How do you settle conflicts?
Talk to the other person, I guess. Though I didn't argue a lot early on in life, and I'm still getting the hang out it in adulthood.
My word is law, sort of like Chuck Norris.
Write, argue, think, debate. That's how I do things.
Do you enjoy a good argument?
To a certain extent, but remember who's in charge here.
Heck yeah! I spend a lot of my time arguing.
It's necessary when you're trying to corral a large group.
How are you with responsibility?
Well, my first big project involved assigning a lot of names, and I did pretty well with that. Second big project, not so much.
Happy to take it. My supervisor scouted me for the position, and I'm proud to have what responsibilities I do.
Well, I was hand-picked for my leadership role, and I couldn't exactly say no.
How do you keep the lines of communication open?
Definitely a one-on-one communicator. No need for go-betweens.
I let my people know when I'm mad with them, or when they're doing well.
Talk to them, and be clear about what your expectations are.
Are you a fan of travel?
NO! Seems like the further I get from home, the more troublesome things get.
Well, I bear with it for work's sake, but I'm looking forward to one day when I don't have to.
Oh yeah. Like Johnny Cash, I've been everywhere, man ...
If I have to, yes. That wasn't always the case ...
Got a lot of relatives?
I've got a brother and sister. We actually work together.
Well, I've got brothers and sisters after a fashion ...
I've got a brother, and we work together.
What do you plan on making for dinner?
Whatever I've got saved up. I worked hard to get it, can't let it go to waste.
Same thing we eat every day. As far as food goes, variety is the spice of life, but not my culinary lifestyle.
Maybe pork or shellfish? I was raised Jewish, but converted.
Whatever it is, it'll be kosher. And probably pescatarian-friendly.
The kids won't quiet down in the backseat. What do you do?
Tell them to quit it. One's always picking on the other, and I keep telling him that he should keep an eye on his brother, not always be at his throat.
Tell them we're turning this Grand Caravan around this instant if they don't knock it off. If I have to make a new rule about being respectful, so help me God...
Explain to them what happens if they misbehave, and be forceful about it. Remind them that this is not how we behave in this family.
If they misbehave, they're out. Leave them at a rest stop.
You've actually got a free day. What do you do with it?
Probably spend it with the wife and kids anyway
Oh, hiking in the mountains, definitely. Good to clear my head and just get up there and be, you know? Also, that's where the best ideas come to me.
Oh, catching up on emails and working on a writing project or two
Probably acting as a shoulder to cry on for a friend or co-worker. People say I'm like a rock to them, and I'm happy to help.
What position would you play in football?
Oh gosh-- I used to live in a gorgeous spot and spent a lot of time running, so maybe wide receiver? I didn't have a whole lot to do back then.
Running back. I move a lot, and I'm great at finding weird openings up the middle.
I'm big on sending things over a distance, so probably a West Coast-style quarterback.
Linebacker. I'm in charge of this situation, and feel like I'm always stopping anything that might get out of hand.
What's your favorite musical?
I like Carousel-- any story about a guy and a girl is one I like.
Lord of the Rings (yes, they made a musical of it), because it features a wilderness journey and a wise elder. What more do you want from a story?
The Music Man, I guess? I can identify with someone who's persuasive and on the road a lot.
Probably Fiddler on the Roof. Sticking to traditions is important to keep a family, or any group, solid.
What movie could you watch on repeat?
The original Alien-- a small cast, and people dealing with something awful and unexpected. I can relate to that.
Gods and Generals-- I can really relate to Robert E. Lee, one man trying to hold it all together.
I like that movie The Paper-- writers coming together to make a change.
Honestly, it's probably Franco Zefferelli's Jesus of Nazareth.
Where do you stand on the introvert/extrovert scale?
Pretty extroverted. I'm comfortable being pretty open. Heck, I'll even talk to animals!
I'm whatever I need to be.
I guess extroverted by virtue of what I do, and enjoying a good debate.
Probably more introverted.
What kind of weather do you prefer?
Partly cloudy, 70 degrees, a mild breeze, and the sun not yet at the point where you need sunblock to be outside
I prefer cloudless skies. It's hard to get around when the ground's mucky.
Doesn't particularly matter to me much, one way or the other. I get my work done.
Whatever helps my people out. When you're riding herd, you've got to be willing to roll with the punches.
Do you often doubt yourself?
Doubt? Yes, but more regret OVER that doubt.
Nope. I get my marching orders from the best.
Nah, I had an experience that sort of knocked that out of me.
Not proud of it, but yup.
Are you more of a thinker or a doer?
Doer. Though it occasionally gets me into trouble.
I'm a pretty good mix of both, I think.
I'm a writer, so thinking is my doing.
Definitely more of a doer
You win the lottery. You invest in...
New shoes for the walking I do, and two-way radios so I can stay in touch with everyone in my crew
Writing supplies. It's not my main way of making money, but writing's definitely my vocation.
Supplies for hitting the road. The people I work with could use them (and me, too).
Got a dream vacation destination?
Tropical, lush, and not a lot of work. Something that reminds me of the old times
Whatever it is, no walking, and not in a hot climate
Wherever I can pitch my tent
I wouldn't mind going somewhere with a nice lake.
If you meet someone, what's your go-to story to demonstrate who you are?
It's probably that crazy one about apple picking with the girlfriend.
Oh man, I don't want to sound crazy but I swear I saw a shrubbery just erupt in flames when I was hiking once...
Probably arguing with another higher up in this group I work with, and how I was able to finesse it.
Well, I hate to say that I've walked on water, but...
What's your spirit animal?
Are you generally an honest person?
Now I am. Formerly, not so much.
Oh, definitely. I'll tell people what they need to hear.
Yup. Don't sugar coat something if it's unpleasant.
Ultimately, yes, though I struggle with it.
How do you feel about being stuck in line?
I don't live around enough people for it to be a problem, so it's not an experience I'm familiar with.
So long as I'm at the front, we're OK.
I'd probably argue my way up to the front of the line.
I'm no more a fan of it than the next guy, but if it's entailed in my job, I'm happy to do it.
Were you born with a silver spoon, or are you just plain folks?
I wasn't born with much, but I had everything I needed. Maybe took it for granted a bit too much...
Born rich, but I didn't stay that way. The job took me in a different direction.
Not fabulously rich, but well off enough to get a good education
Pretty solidly blue collar
What sort of dog breed appeals to you most?
Mastiff, or something that can keep an eye on things and protect me. My new digs aren't quite as nice as the old ones.
Definitely a herding breed ... maybe an English Sheepdog?
Huskies. They travel, they work, and they're not shy about talking.
Great Pyrenees. They're stable, and they protect their flock.
Small town or big city?
Road trip. I come from the big city, but I'm not much for being sedentary.
I'm a small-town guy, originally, but home is where your hat is.
How's your sense of direction?
It's not so much my sense of direction that's a problem, as the fact that I can't go to the one place I want to be.
Good, but you wouldn't think it from appearances.
Excellent. If there's somewhere I need to be, I'm there.
Not bad on land, though a little better on sea, given my old job.
Are you a child of two cultures?
Absolutely. It's a little weird, sometimes, but it really helped me with my life's work.
Not so much a child of two cultures, but I'm definitely someone who started with one identity, and changed to another.
I've got one cultural identity. That said, I'm trying to integrate it with where my life is going in its next stages.
What social media platform is your favorite?
Instagram, so I can see pics of where I used to live. I tend to live in the past.
Slack, so I can keep up with everyone I'm in charge of.
Twitter, so I can communicate easily and frequently.
Facebook, so I can keep up with a lot of people.
What kind of music do you listen to?
Anything that's upbeat and keeps mew distracted from my job, so probably just generic top 40
Anything driving, that's good driving music. Kyuss, Golden Earring, Rush...
Retro metal. Contentious, with a heavy pulsing beat
Smooth jazz. Something I can use to decompress after all the stress I deal with
What color would you choose to see for eternity?
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