Which Classic American Author Are You?

Image: Collage; Henry David Thoreau, Mark Twain, Ernest Hemingway

About This Quiz

American authors come in all forms and from all types of backgrounds. From the adventurous to the hip, which classical American author are you? Take this quiz, and we'll tell you.

What is your favorite time of the year?

Winter.

Spring.

Summer.

Fall.

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What moves you forward?

Making the world a better place.

Not failing.

Money.

Breaking up the authoritarian system.

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Which is most important to you?

Being the center of attention.

Adventure.

Love.

Happiness.

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Where did you grow up?

Near the river.

On the sea.

None of your business.

Anywhere we could afford.

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What kind of a home did you live in?

A mansion.

A nice cottage.

An apartment.

A box. It was a big one though - like TV size.

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What surrounded your home?

Water.

Mountains.

Crappy mosquitoes.

Wilderness.

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Do you consider yourself interesting?

Well, I know my stuff.

Yep, I have great stories.

Well, I'm not uninter...Wait, yes I am.

I'm cool, daddio.

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Which book changed your life?

"The Adventures of Tom Sawyer"

"The Old Man and the Sea"

"Walden"

"Call of the Wild"

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What is your protagonist's weakness?

He's a dullard.

He isn't faithful.

He is paranoid.

He is way too adventurous.

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Which career could you see yourself?

Politician.

War correspondent.

Activist.

Beatnik.

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Which literary career could you totally nail?

Publisher.

Writer.

Literary agent.

Editor.

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Which writing medium would you express yourself?

Memoirist.

Novelist.

Poet.

Playwright.

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What is your relationship status?

Bored.

Wandering.

Isolated.

Healthy.

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Do you have any kids?

No.

A couple. And they are screwed up like me.

One.

Way too many to name right now.

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What is the best thing about being in a relationship?

Love.

Sexy nights.

Comfort.

Having someone I can trust.

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What is your favorite pet?

Dog.

Cats with no tail.

A wild pet.

Lizards.

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Which animal would terrify you if it crept up on you at night?

Snake.

Bear.

Opposum.

Wolf.

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Which is your favorite animal?

Deer.

Elephant.

Dog.

Fish.

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What time does your alarm clock go off?

Too early every day.

7 a.m sharp.

By 5 a.m

I don't even bother.

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How do you wake up in the morning?

Ice cold shower.

Coffee and keep it coming.

I get into a fight with my neighbor.

A full breakfast.

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How do you know you are too tired?

I fall asleep at my work desk.

I get cranky.

I trip over everything.

I babble my words.

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What is your favorite leisure activity?

Reading.

Talking.

Sleeping.

Gettin' my groove on.

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Which would you collect?

Baseball cards.

Old fishing poles.

Coins.

Books.

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Which sport would you like to compete?

Baseball.

Football.

Track.

Tennis.

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Where can you be found on a Saturday night?

Walking along the river.

At a bar.

Alone.

Chillin' at the coffee shop.

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Which cuisine do you prefer?

American.

Thai.

Chinese.

Indian.

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Where is your favorite place to take a date?

A rooftop retreat.

My place.

A lesser-known hole-in-the-wall.

A picnic.

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What would you like to write about?

Bad politics.

Treasure hunting.

Living life in solitude.

Life with animals.

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Which is your favorite quote?

"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."

"There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self."

"It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see."

"I had nothing to offer anybody except my own confusion."

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What makes a better writer?

Curiosity.

Experience.

Pain.

Solitude.

FINISH QUIZ

You Got: