Which Famous Cowboy Are You Most Like?

By: Pierre Roustan
Estimated Completion Time
6 min
Which Famous Cowboy Are You Most Like?
Image: Wiki Commons

About This Quiz

Who doesn't want to wield a gun and ride out into the sunset on your steed with a lovely lady behind you, wrapping her arms around your waist as you play some of the coolest country music in your head? That's the life of a cowboy.

Still to this day, the cowboy life is a part of American culture rich with heritage and legend, both in fantasy and realism. You could be wrestling with a bear or an actual tornado. Either way, you were considered a cowboy of the Wild, Wild West, and your figure was cemented for all time in the annals of prideful history that Americans still to this day thrill to and enjoy thoroughly. This is why those classic figures like John Wayne and Clint Eastwood continue to rank up there as icons of the masculine age.

There's just one slight problem -- they're fictional! However, cowboys back in the day did exist. They are real. And for some of them, you'd be surprised that they existed at all given some of the things they've done. All of them were legends, no doubt -- and at least one of them you'd identify with the most from a legendary personality perspective. We know you're asking the ultimate question, though -- if I were a cowboy, which one would I be? Here's your chance to find out. Take this quiz right now!

What is one of your favorite movies of all time?
Unforgiven
Young Guns I or II or Both
The Magnificent Seven
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure

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Your classmate whispers to you during a test: "What's the answer to question #5? Come on, help me out there!" What do you say?
I'd raise my hand for the teacher and rat on him! Kid's going to be in real trouble now! No cheating in this class, sorry.
I smirk, check my surroundings, and I then pass a note with the answer very discreetly.
Give me five dollars, and I'll give you ALL the goods, dude.
Purposely give him the WRONG answer and then giggle to myself.

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How many girls would ask you out to prom or homecoming?
I honestly don't know. I think they're too afraid to come up to me.
Only one. My dearest love. My flower. My rose. My petal. My angel. Yes.
Umm ... Lost count.
A big, fat, bloated zero

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Let's say you like country music. What's your favorite song?
"The Thunder Rolls" by Garth Brooks
"That's Something to Be Proud Of" by Montgomery Gentry
"Life Is a Highway" by Tom Cochrane or Rascal Flatts
"Wynona's Big Brown Beaver" by Primus

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OK, maybe you don't like country music. What's your favorite genre then?
Classical
Opera
Pop
Reggae

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Who's your favorite poet?
Edgar Allan Poe
William Shakespeare
Robert Frost
Busta Rhymes

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The lights go out in your house, and you have no choice but to occupy yourself with a book. What do you read?
Philosophy by Friedrich Nietzsche.
Any cheesy romance novel, really
An action thriller
A Deadpool comic book

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What is your favorite sport to play?
Football. I'm the quarterback, in fact.
Golf
Ping pong
Dance Dance Revolution. Come on, that's the sport, you get good exercise!

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Let's say you're a kid in middle school. What do you want to be when you grow up?
An astronaut
A novelist
An actor
A game show host

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Let's say you're about to go to college. What's your major?
Criminal justice
Creative writing
Drama
Video game design

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What's your favorite TV show?
Law and Order
Game of Thrones
Riverdale
The Big Bang Theory

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Who's your favorite Disney villain of all time?
Cruella de Vil
Maleficent
Shere Khan
Prince John

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You mentioned the sport you like to play. What about the sport you like to watch?
I do like watching basketball.
I'll watch baseball from time to time.
Give me football any day, especially when it's the Super Bowl.
Gymnastics. Only females. They're super hawt.

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If you had an option to visit any country, which country would you see?
Germany
France
United Kingdom
I'd sneak into Mexico.

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Which character do you identify with the most in J.R.R. Tolkien's "Lord of the Rings"?
Aragorn
Gandalf
Legolas
Gimli

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Do you have a favorite firearm you'd love to own?
I fashion myself a Winchester.
Can't I just have a Red Rider BB gun??
A Glock, man. I jus' strap it on and go.
I want both a Winchester and a Glock, honestly. But I'll take a BB gun, too, just for fun!

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What's your favorite movie quote?
"May the Force be with you. Always." - Star Wars
"Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." - Casablanca
"Say HELLO to my little friend!" - Scarface
"You talkin' to me?" - Taxi Driver

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How many push-ups can you do?
A kajillion billion. Watch me do it right now.
I dunno, ten or twenty?
Sit on my back, and I'll show you just how much I can do.
How many can YOU do, partner?

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Can you recite the entire Pledge of Allegiance right now?
Absolutely.... (AHEM) I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America. And to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
Sure.... I pledge allegiance to the flag of my heart, which belongs to the US of A, and to the Republic for which I stand tall and proud under God undivided with the right to love freely.
Why, yes of course! (PULLS OUT A MICROPHONE AND STARTS SINGING THE NATIONAL ANTHEM)
I pitch allegations to the United States of Freedom Republic which I stand upon indivisibly in defense of something and other stuff that's supposed to be said.

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You have a serious case of the munchies. What do you grab from the fridge?
Celery and ranch dressing
Some warm chili to eat by the fireplace
Leftover bison meat
Lots and lots and lots of pickles

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If you wanted to own a horse, which breed would it be?
Clydesdale
Stallion
Mustang
Thoroughbred

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Your family has a pet. What pet is it?
A Great Dane
A Maine Coon cat
Cows or chickens or both
A ferret

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It's Friday night, and you just got out of work. What do you get to do tonight?
I get to patrol the streets in the middle of the night, waiting for crimes to occur. Because I'm Batman.
I get to take my honey out to dinner and then see the latest romantic comedy in the theater.
I get to relax for a bit and then go to my second job as a Chippendale's dancer.
I get to play Fortnite!

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You have a crush at school, and you have an opportunity to introduce yourself. What do you say?
"Welcome to our lovely prison, my princess. Can I help you with your books?"
"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Thou art more beautiful than 99% of the ladies here, if I may say so."
"Want to go out and see a movie? I'll show you around town!"
"I, I, I -- uuh, yeah -- desperately want to make love to a schoolboy and eat some nachos with you."

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What's your favorite subject in school?
History
English
Woodworking
Skipping

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Assuming you have your own room, what kind of posters do you have on your wall?
8X10s of all the past presidents of the United States
Artsy paintings and portraits
Epic movie posters
Naked pictures

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Your parents demand you get a job while in high school. Where do you start?
I get online and fill out a dozen applications. It's a numbers game.
I flip through the newspaper and answer classifieds, then I march door to door with businesses, presenting my curriculum vitae and cover accordingly.
I walk into the restaurant around the corner and start washing dishes even before speaking to the manager.
I draw ponies. With laser beams shooting out of their eyeballs.

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What are the three branches of the United States government?
The Executive, Legislative and Judicial. Duh.
The judge, jury and executioner
Dumb, dumber and dumbest
Me, myself and I

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What does truth, justice and the American Way mean to you?
It means we have the right to defend our country from hoodlums. Even if it means owning an AK-47.
It means we have the right to fall in love and pursue happiness.
It means we should always speak the truth, for it's the truth that tells us who we are.
It means we have the right to remain silent, and anything you say can and will be held against you in a court of law.

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What state would you like to live in?
Arizona
New York
Texas
Mental!!!

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You Got: