Which Norse God Would Be Your BFF?

By: Geoff Hoppe
Estimated Completion Time
6 min
You're all ready to go on a road trip with some friends. Excited for it?
Heck yeah! I love road trips. Some of my best stories are from my travels.
Sure, I'll tag along. I love seeing what sort of trouble I can get into.
I like to wander around incognito, so I guess that counts as a road trip.
Depends. Are people attractive where we're going?

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What sort of movie is your favorite?
Action. Whoever said "violence never solved anything" hasn't seen "Die Hard," or "Lethal Weapon," or "The Matrix," or "Gladiator," or...
Anything with a compelling anti-hero. Virtue is boring.
Anything where there's a happy ending, and people are being brave.
Something steamy. I'll even settle for a rom-com if that's the closest I can get.

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How do you deal with trolls?
Smash 'em. If you don't smash em, they won't learn anything.
Counter troll them! I'm an excellent counter-troll.
Let them know who's boss. I tend to be in charge of any situation I happen upon.
Depends. Is the troll attractive? Trolls can be cute, too.

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What qualities do you look for in a mate?
I'm a sucker for blondes.
I go for people who are rough around the edges.
Someone stable, in case I want to start a family.
What qualities DON'T I look for...

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What's your favorite sport?
Football! Contact, competition, and strength, all in one game.
Probably hockey - it takes strategy, and you can be dirty, too.
Anything fair and ordered, like baseball.
Either track or cross-country - gotta be able to pursue the person you're chasing after!

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What's your ideal pet?
If I could have a bear as a pet, I definitely would.
Snakes are cool. They get a bad rap.
I'm a dog person. A husky might not be a bad idea...
Something that likes contact and affection. Maybe a King Charles spaniel?

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Are you a people person?
Yup, I'm up for anything. Challenge me, and I'm happy to fight, race, or compete. Need a hand, and just call my name.
Depends on what fun I can have with them.
Yes. I'm pretty protective, and I'm the friend who keeps an eye on everyone.
Sure! Can't date around without being a people person...

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What achievement of your kids would make you proudest?
Beating the biggest kid in their class in a wrestling match
Upsetting the status quo in some way
Helping others envision what they should do, and what's right
Netting the prom queen/king

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What's your fashion sense?
Something sturdy and functional
Stylish and slick
Nothing that draws too much attention to me
Whatever brings out my good features.

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What kind of music do you like?
Heavy metal
Free jazz
Classical
Romantic

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What's gym time like for you?
Lifting. Going beast mode. Gains, baby.
Eh, I can be a bit lazy. I'll hit the treadmill, but I don't want to overexert myself.
I'll check in with my gym buddies, make sure to do several exercises that complement each other, and generally ride herd on the place.
Some exercise, and some time checking people out...

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What's your ideal car?
Hummer
Miata
Town Car
Lamborghini

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What's your attitude about taking on responsibility?
Do it to it.
If you need me, I'll be somewhere else.
Being in charge suits me, so I love responsibility.
I HAVE a responsibility...to be beautiful.

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Got any major hang-ups?
I hate to lose, I hate being tricked, and I hate being in pain.
Yeah, when people try to nail me down or hold me to something. I'm an open flame, baby. You can't hold me back.
I can never shake the feeling that something bad will eventually happen, that things eventually fall apart...
People who give you the cold shoulder.

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What's for dinner?
Steak. Pork chops. Goat, possibly. Also, mead.
Eh, whatever I feel like that day. I can worry about my health tomorrow.
Something well-balanced, getting the food groups in.
As much as I feel like! The more, the better!

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What's your motto?
Strength and loyalty
Get it while you can
Holding it all together
Give whatever you have freely

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What kind of books do you like to read?
Not much of a reader. Though I love a good adventure.
So long as there's cleverness and moral ambiguity, you've got my attention.
Probably a new book about leadership and work/life balance
Let's just say "Lady Chatterley's Lover" was a bit too PG for me.

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You've got a free night for the first time in ages. What do you do?
Go look for something fun to do! Sitting around the house is dull.
Find someone who's doing something and go along with them. It's fun to insert yourself into situations and see what mischief you can make.
Probably stay home and relax
Go out on the prowl. The world's full of attractive people, and I intend to find them.

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Are you a fan of home improvement projects?
I'll help out, but it's not my first choice.
The last time I tried to help, things got really weird, so no.
Yes. If you want your home to be stable, you've got to be proactive about making it so.
Not really my thing

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What's your favorite fast food restaurant?
Wendy's
Raising Cane's
Subway
Jack in the Box

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Which of the following vacation ideas most appeals to you?
Deep sea fishing.
Taking advantage of someone else's plans, whatever they are
Something the whole family can enjoy, like camping or a theme park
A cruise

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Who's your favorite "Game of Thrones" character?
The Hound
Littlefinger
Ned Stark
Loris Tyrell

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Would you be willing to wear a dress in public?
Hoo boy...well, there was this one time...
No. Cross-dressed once. It did NOT go well.
I'm all for going incognito, but that's a tad much.
Hey, whatever floats your boat. Can I get your number?

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What's your attitude about planning and organization?
It entails too much thinking.
Planning is just scheming without the fun.
Both are necessary, and make for a stable situation.
I could get into it, but it's not my first choice.

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If you ran for office, what would your strategy be?
Be bluntly honest. Subterfuge is dishonorable.
Tell people what they want to hear. Once you're in power, you can be yourself.
Try to be a mediator who keeps peace between parties.
Kiss babies...and adults...and pretty much everyone.

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Your kids are getting out of hand. What's your response?
They did WHAT?!
Good work, fellas! Way to make me proud!
Explain to them, calmly and firmly, right and wrong. Punish them fairly.
Well, kids will be kids...

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Are you more a thinker or a doer?
Doer
Thinker, insofar as I can get other people to do the "doing" for me.
I balance thought and action.
I wouldn't put a label on it.

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Stones or Beatles?
Zeppelin
Stones
Beatles
Barry White

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Where are you on the introvert/extrovert spectrum?
Probably a little more extrovert.
I'll be whatever I need to be to get ahead.
I'll play the role needed when needed.
Extroverted. Other people are fun!

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What's your favorite dessert?
Brownies
Crème brulee
Cake, or something the whole family can share
Chocolate decadence

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