Which Venomous Snake Will Your Ex Be Reincarnated As?

By: Ian Fortey

Which Venomous Snake Will Your Ex Be Reincarnated As?
Image: Nicolas Reusens/Moment/Getty Images

About This Quiz

Reincarnation and transformation have been pretty important parts of many belief systems over the centuries. All walks of life have believed that there comes a period of change and rebirth at some point in time.  The idea appeals to us in a very basic kind of karma way.  You act a certain way, and you will be rewarded accordingly, for better or for worse.  

The good people in this life who work hard and make things better for those around them can expect something much better down the road. And the not so good people well, maybe they need to learn some harder lesson. Their next bite at the apple could be a little less glorious. People like that ex of yours who you just know are bad news still. Maybe their next life is less soaring eagles and more side-winding, venomous snakes.

Everyone has that one ex, the one we wish we had never even met them, let alone get in a relationship with. But since you can't do that, the least you can do is answer some questions about your relationship so we can tell you what kind of venom-filled, legless reptile their next life holds in wait. Take the quiz and see!

No doubt there were a lot of reasons why you and your ex broke up, but what was the biggest one?
They cheated on me.
They were abusive.
I'd rather not talk about it, but it was bad.
They just sucked so much.

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When you were still together, even when things were good, what was your ex's worth habit?
They had some super gross eating habits.
Snoring
Things were never good.
They were super indecisive.

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How did you even meet your ex in the first place?
I met them out in a club.
I'd known them for years.
I met them online.
Friends introduced us.

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After you guys broke up, did your ex ever try to convince you to come back?
At first, yeah
In a clumsy way
No, I broke off contact completely.
Constantly

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Thinking about it now, how many of your exes do you think are probably destined to come back as slithering reptiles?
All of them?
Maybe a couple
Just that one
Honestly, I feel like the one I'm thinking of will somehow screw up reincarnation, so maybe none of them.

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How long did the two of you spend together as an official couple?
About a year
Under three years
Too long
It was more than three years.

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Was there ever a time when you considered maybe taking your ex back?
Maybe at first. For a very short time.
Ugh. Briefly.
Not even for a second
Yeah, I thought about it.

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What was it that made you stay with your ex for as long as you did?
We really clicked at first. Had good conversations and got along well.
They were a lot of fun at first.
I had no good reason to stay at all.
They could be really sweet and nice.

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No one's judging you here - do you ever creep your ex on social media?
No, I've moved on.
I'm not proud of it, but I have.
No! They're blocked everywhere.
Sometimes

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What's something nice you could say about your ex today?
I don't have to see them anymore. That's nice.
We had fun that one time.
Not a thing
They could have been a lot worse?

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If a snake is what the next life holds, what animal is your ex most like in this life?
I think a snake still fits.
Bull
Wolf
Jellyfish

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When you argued with your ex, did they keep it relevant or bring up all kinds of crazy things?
Our arguments were mostly just insults and being mean.
My ex would bring up past stuff all the time.
They would bring up anything they could.
They barely stayed relevant.

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Was your ex a liar?
Big time!
Sometimes
Yeah, they could make up some stories.
That wasn't really our problem.

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Did any friends ever try to warn you about your ex being bad news before you realized it?
Well, eventually they figured it out.
Not back then, no
Yes!
Nope

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Was your ex the kind of person who was always spending time with their own friends?
They had a best friend, but not like a gang or anything.
Yeah, they went out and did their own thing a lot.
Not really
They did family stuff, mostly.

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Did your ex accept the breakup or did they try to fight in and convince you that you were wrong?
They knew they screwed up and got caught doing it.
It was a struggle.
My ex didn't accept anything.
They begged me not to go, is that the same?

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What did you do with yourself the first night you were single?
Went out with friends to celebrate
I spent some time with my family.
Got a good night's sleep
I got a chance to relax and just enjoy myself.

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What would you do if you ran into your ex out in public at a store or a bar?
That'll be worth a glare and an eye-roll.
Keep my distance
Leave
Ignore them

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Did your ex leave any of their stuff at your place after you broke up?
Yes. I kept the stuff that I could use.
No, they took it all.
Yes. I trashed it all.
There's still some junk around here somewhere.

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Do you feel like you learned any important lessons from your experience with your ex?
That I deserve respect
To be more careful with who I trust
Yes. Avoid awful people.
Just to keep true to myself

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What did your ex do with most of their free time?
They were online all the time.
Partied
Whatever I was doing
Video games and movies

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What could you do to really get under your ex's skin and annoy them?
Look over their shoulder while they were texting or on social media
Hang out with their friends
Go out with friends and leave them alone
Leave the big decisions up to them

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On a basic level, do you think your ex was a bad person?
I mean... they weren't good.
Bad evil or bad like fruit that needs to be thrown out?
110%
Maybe not a bad person but bad for me

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Do you and your ex still travel in the same social circles?
Yeah, I see them every now and then.
Not really, no
Not at all
We have a few mutual friends still.

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Did your ex have a lot of charm?
Too much, now that I think about it.
I don't know if charm is the right word. Maybe.
Some
They were kind of awkward, actually.

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What did you think of your ex's family?
We got along OK.
I was not a fan.
Never met them.
They were really nice, actually.

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When your birthday or the holidays rolled around, how was your ex at gift-giving?
Not too bad
My ex had a habit of forgetting birthdays.
They were kind of crappy.
They were pretty thoughtful about gifts, oddly enough.

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How long were you and your ex broken up before you tried dating someone else?
Not too long. I wanted to move on.
It took a while.
I haven't yet.
Within a few weeks, maybe. Nothing serious, just dating.

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Looking back on your whole relationship, would it have been better if you never met your ex?
No, I just wish they could have been different.
All things being equal, probably
Definitely
We had some good times.

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Has your ex creeped you on social media since the breakup?
Not that I know of
Yes. I know they're lurking.
Nope, they're totally blocked.
They try to like and comment on photos.

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You Got:

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